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Thread: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

  1. #1
    Flashaholic uh1c's Avatar
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    Ohgeez Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    Last night I realized I had not seen my 6P for a while and decided to check my car. I grabbed my new Gree and went to search. Battery died in less than 1 minute. WTF? Oh duh! I had been doing runtime tests on RCR123s....

    I thought back to other bonehead stunts I had pulled with flashlights over the years and thought I'd share my "conspicuous stupidity in a public place" stunts.

    Like the time I was speaking to a cute young lady and had my hand resting on my duty belt. I did not notice I had activated the tailcap switch and subsequently melted the cheap nylon holster it was in. "Do you smell something burning?" Duh, yeah...
    [BTW, I once did the same with a pepper spray canister, real smart!, not]

    The time I got out of the vehicle and had my Bianchi B-lite slide out of its belt ring and onto my foot in front of a crowd of 50. I suavely just picked it up; like I do this all the time. (Only a slight limp could be detected...)

    All the times I checked my lights by looking into the lens and turning it on. Duh! "Guess its working, can someone point me toward the exit?"

    The time I gently laid my Maglight on the roof of someone's car and forgot it was there...they drove off and it bounced off their trunk..."No Ma'am, I think you ran over a rock, Have a nice day!"

    Looking down a 200 ft. cave pit and watching a flashlight spin down the drop. Laughing at the carelessness of a fellow caver and then realizing I was the flashlight's owner. Duh!

    Won't count all the times I forgot to bring extra batteries. "Ah, sir, your flashlight is not working" "Oh, thanks!" Duh!

    Still looking for that 6P, gotta be around here somewhere...

    Anyone else willing to risk public ridicule stories here?

    UH1C

  2. #2
    Flashaholic* MarNav1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    Too many to list!

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    I rigged up a cheap plastic gun case with some foam to hold some of my modified Mags. After cutting the foam and putting everything in the case for the first time, I left it sitting on the porch because I had glued a couple pieces of foam together with some rather odorous glue. A short while later, I noticed a bright glow on the porch. I found that one of the raised sections on the eggcrate foam was punching down on the button of my Mag2D ROP and it had melted a hole in the side of the case. Now I make sure to turn the buttons to the side, and loosen the tailcaps to prevent accidental activation for long term storage or transport.

  4. #4
    Flashaholic herbicide's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    Mine's here.

  5. #5
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    Ohgeez Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    I was driving in the Lake Tahoe wilderness looking for the cabin my wife and inlaws were staying at. It was dark and I could not read the directions. So what does this genius do while driving I might add?! I use my 6P with BOG Cree premium drop in to illuminate the directions. I blinded myself and I was extremely fortunate not to kill someone or drive myself into the Truckee River.

    Duh...

    BTW uh1c, do you work for the Reno Sheriff's department? Just kidding!!! Welcome to CPF

  6. #6
    Flashaholic uh1c's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    Thanks for the welcome kelmo! Not Reno 911.
    [Food or flashlight? well, if I have burger king for the next month can I get that Tiablo A9?]
    UH1C
    Last edited by uh1c; 09-21-2007 at 05:44 PM. Reason: A9 not T9, duh!

  7. #7
    *Flashaholic* greenLED's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    uh1c

    Quote Originally Posted by uh1c View Post
    Anyone else willing to risk public ridicule stories here?
    The very first time I got my hands on a Pila GL3, and couldn't figure out how to turn the LED tailcap on. My grade-school son had to show me how ("turn the batteries around, dad").


  8. #8

    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    a cpl years ago I knocked a favorite light off the batthroom sink ledge into the "just Used" and not flushed yet toilet. (yes it was #2). I never felt the same about that light again. and I dont take lights into the bathroom anymore

  9. #9
    Flashaholic* Brozneo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    LOL I've had a few close calls in that regard!!!!
    BROZNEO

  10. #10
    Flashaholic* woodrow's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    When I was in college, I had bought one of those latex banded waterbaloon launchers. The ones that take three people to use. One night we wanted to see how high we could lauch a small but heavy flashlight. I got on the ground to pull back the cargo pouch and 2 of my buddies (about 10 of us present) went to the landing above to hold the handles.

    The light shot easily 250' into the air before we lost it. We all stood around in a group just looking up and trying to find it...we knew it had to be right over head. All of a sudden, one of us mentioned that inerta might have shut it off and it might be coming down pretty fast. We all ran off in 10 different directions and it just missed my buddy as it hit the ground with considerable force.

    Oh well, thats why college is considered a learning experience.
    Last edited by woodrow; 09-21-2007 at 04:51 PM. Reason: spelling error
    "I only smile in the dark...my only comfort is the night gone black..."lyrics from Garbage

  11. #11
    *Flashaholic* Burgess's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    to Woodrow --




    _

  12. #12
    Flashaholic* Northern Lights's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    I carry two 5761 hot wires to work. One a MagCharger powered on 5400 mAh of NiMh the other a 2c-cell powered by AW Lithium Cs. Needless to say either in my duty belt is a lumbar crusher so I dump them into my go-bag and head of to work.
    Not once but twice two weeks ago I set the go-bag on fire while on my way to work by accidently bumping the MagCharger to ON. The smell of smoke was the first sign of stupidity. It also cracked the sodalime window of the light, luckily they are sold in pairs.
    <; )}}}}>< I fish therfore I am... pic links: '03,'07,'08

  13. #13
    Flashaholic* MarNav1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    Was going to sell a light. Put the cells in backwards and burnt out the light. No longer for sale, duh!

  14. #14
    *Flashaholic* Monocrom's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by uh1c View Post

    All the times I checked my lights by looking into the lens and turning it on. Duh! "Guess its working, can someone point me toward the exit?"


    Won't count all the times I forgot to bring extra batteries. "Ah, sir, your flashlight is not working" "Oh, thanks!" Duh!


    Anyone else willing to risk public ridicule stories here?

    UH1C
    I stopped checking my lights that way soon after getting my Surefire L4.

    Who needs extra batteries, when you have extra lights on you.

    My story isn't exactly public ridicule. (No one noticed me, looking like an idiot). A few weeks ago, I was putting together a list of B&M stores in NYC that sell flashlights, for CPF. I had just finished visiting the last store in Woodside, and decided to get some food at a nearby Pizza place. I had been there only once before, a few months ago. And I forgot where the light-switch for their restroom is located. So I'm standing in this tiny bathroom, as the door closes shut behind me, in total darkness, feeling around for the light-switch on the walls, and can't find it.

    I prop open the door to let in a bit of light, and I'm looking around the walls for the switch.... there isn't one!

    So I use my foot to keep the door open a bit, so that I can see and aim at the toilet while I take a pee. Now I'm just hoping no one walks by the door or has to use the restroom.

    At this point you're probably wondering why I didn't close the door, and just use my EDC light. Well, for the first time since becoming addicted to lights, I left all 3 of the lights I usually carry, at home. Can't recall why I removed the Photon II and Inova Microlight that I usually carry on my house keys. My larger, usually 2 cell 123A light was left at home in anticipation of buying a new light that morning. But by that afternoon, it became clear that nothing struck my fancy. So I was without even a key-chain light.

    When I was done using the bathroom, I found the switch.... on a wall outside of the bathroom door.

    BTW, carrot would love this thread.
    "The World is insane. With tiny spots of sanity, here and there... Not the other way around!" - John Cleese.

  15. #15
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    Crackup Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by woodrow View Post
    When I was in college, I had bought one of those latex banded waterbaloon launchers. The ones that take three people to use. One night we wanted to see how high we could lauch a small but heavy flashlight...The light shot easily 250' into the air before we lost it...
    Talk about good throw!!! LOL

  16. #16
    Flashaholic Katdaddy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by woodrow View Post
    When I was in college, I had bought one of those latex banded waterbaloon launchers. The ones that take three people to use. One night we wanted to see how high we could lauch a small but heavy flashlight. I got on the ground to pull back the cargo pouch and 2 of my buddies (about 10 of us present) went to the landing above to hold the handles.

    The light shot easily 250' into the air before we lost it. We all stood around in a group just looking up and trying to find it...we knew it had to be right over head. All of a sudden, one of us mentioned that inerta might have shut it off and it might be coming down pretty fast. We all ran off in 10 different directions and it just missed my buddy as it hit the ground with considerable force.

    Oh well, thats why college is considered a learning experience.

    Ahhhh.......Alcohol and youth!!! I remember it well.
    I don't suffer from Flashaholism........I enjoy every minute of it!

    Sic Luceat Lux

  17. #17
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by woodrow View Post
    When I was in college, I had bought one of those latex banded waterbaloon launchers. The ones that take three people to use.........
    I remember using one of those to shoot from the dorms, over the pool, and pegging people coming out of the student center. Due to the hang time, we could fire, shut the dorm room door, and watch the impact through the window without anybody seeing us. That saved our butts. Unfortunately during one shot around the corner comes one of the campus cops who prompltly gets a direct hit on his squad car. Obviously, that was the end of our fun for the day. Thankfully, nobody spotted which door the shots were coming from.

  18. #18
    *Flashaholic* greenLED's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by Katdaddy View Post
    Ahhhh.......Alcohol and youth!!! I remember it well.
    ...which prolly means you didn't have enough of something.

  19. #19

    Popcorn Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    While not a flashlight story it does have to do with lights, lots of them.

    I had acquired 12 M5 flashbulbs. These are big, powerful, and bright. I was living in a dormitory on Langley AFB at the time. So what do we do with the bulbs as we cannot use them. The answer was seemingly simple. We wire all the bulbs together (parallel) so they can all be triggered at the same time. Then get a car battery to fire the lights, voltage about right, current certainly good enough.

    We wait until dark, real dark. We then hang the lights out the window, wait for a couple of unsuspecting people. We then trigger the bulbs. Did I mention the bubs were bright. The flash was enourmous, huge, blindingly so. It attracted the attention of the base security police and for the next hour there were half a dozen emergency vehicles looking for the source of the bright light.

    We kept a low profile, stayed in our room, kept the lights off on that stunt.
    Last edited by raythompson; 09-25-2007 at 08:27 AM.
    RayT

  20. #20

    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    ^
    MY EDC: JETBEAM M1X - it replaced 8 other lights.

  21. #21
    Flashaholic* LEDcandle's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by luminata View Post
    a cpl years ago I knocked a favorite light off the batthroom sink ledge into the "just Used" and not flushed yet toilet. (yes it was #2). I never felt the same about that light again. and I dont take lights into the bathroom anymore
    Please don't put that light on the B/S/T...

  22. #22
    *Flashaholic* Monocrom's Avatar
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    Crackup Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by LEDcandle View Post
    Please don't put that light on the B/S/T...
    Way to give him the idea!
    "The World is insane. With tiny spots of sanity, here and there... Not the other way around!" - John Cleese.

  23. #23
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    Tonight. There are two of us running a late session in the office, and as we leave it is dark. We turn off the lights and can't see to make the exit through the maze of desks and chairs.
    So I say "hang on a moment" and rummage for a minute or so through my bag for my Arc AAA with luxeon---totally forgetting that I had a Fenix on a lanyard and resting in my shirt pocket!
    Greg

  24. #24
    Flashaholic* FlashSpyJ's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    great storys guys!

    I dont really have a good story to tell, but I´ll tell it anyway..

    It was in highschool? ( I was 15-16 years old) My MagLite D4 was rather new to me, and the class was on a camping trip. Late in the evening or perhaps it was in the middle of the nigh... anyway.. Some of the girls was about to take a skinny dip (swim nude) with some boys they allowed to join them. I was excluded from the choosen ones... so instead of letting the lucky ones go have their fun, I decided to take my extremely bright maglite and shine on them, just to disturb them. The ladies got VERY aggrevated at me and scream alot telling me to take a hike...

    I did and after that I wasnt the most popular guy in the class...One of the lucky dudes was one of my best friends, even he was very upset with me...

    Moral of my story... use your light wisely!

  25. #25
    *Flashaholic* Monocrom's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by FlashSpyJ View Post

    Moral of my story... use your light wisely!
    Or at least hide behind a tree before turning your light on.
    "The World is insane. With tiny spots of sanity, here and there... Not the other way around!" - John Cleese.

  26. #26
    *Flashaholic* Burgess's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    Moral of the story...


    -- Carry a camera with telephoto lens and powerful FLASH,

    rather than that rather-useless Mag-Lite.


    At least you woulda' been really popular with some of the students !


  27. #27
    *Flashaholic* Patriot's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    I had been running one of my Costco HIDs for a while and noticed that the inside of the glass window was fogged. I disassembled it for cleaning and also noticed dust on the reflector. I blew it off with canned air and lightly wiped it with a micro-fiber cloth. Turns out the bulb was still very hot and cooked the cloth onto the bulb and coated one side of it black...sigh. I had to remove the bulb and scrape the black off with a razor blade. I didn't feel very smart.

  28. #28
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    I tend to do something stupid when I'm opening a new light for the first time.

    Sometime back I got a Gerber IU. Slitting open the clamshell packing I took a hefty nick out of the lousy type II anodize in a rather obvious place (in fairness, the light is so worn now you cannot see this any more).

    Putting the batteries in my brand new SL Propolly 4AA, sitting on the kitchen floor. . . put the batteries in, put the LED inside the head, screw it down, holding the light vertical. I hadn't thought that the switch could be in the 'on' position, and got a blast of light in the eyes when the head was screwed down enough to make contact.

    Then only a month or so ago, when opening my new SF E2L from the clamshell package. Being aware of the Gerber IU damage, I sliced around the edge of the casing, expecting it would fall open. It didn't. I gave it a good pull and it came apart with a loud bang, sending the light flying through the air and landing heavily on the kitchen floor. Luckily, not a scratch. Ah, that's why you get quality lights!

    Not exactly public humiliation, but I'm always entertained by my own stupidity anyway.
    "Do not go gentle into that good night,
    Rage, rage against the dying of the light."

  29. #29
    Flashaholic Dr.K's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    Yea, I got a fresh one. Gave my 5yo a G2L to play with at the camp site. The next morning, Poof. gone.
    Kyle

  30. #30
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    Default Re: Bonehead Flashlight Stories

    Hello Kyle,

    Were you ever able to find your 5 year old?

    Tom
    Behind every Great man there's always a woman rolling her eyes...

    Most batteries don't die - they are tortured to near death, then murdered...

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