Here's a little joke to cheer you and mama up March...and remember, dogs and cats and probably old ladies and parrots are edible...
Lab Report and Cat Scan
A woman brought a very limp parrot into a veterinary hospital. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the Vet shook his head sadly and said, "I'm so sorry, Polly has passed
The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure? I mean, you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."
The vet rolled his eyes, shrugged, turned and left the room returning a few moments later with a beautiful black Labrador. As the bird's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the dead parrot from top to bottom. He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.
"A dog shakes its head and I'm supposed to believe that?!" cries the woman.
The vet again leaves momentarily, comes back with a cat and puts it on the table beside the parrot. The cat looks closely at the parrot, walks around it, prods it a bit, then shakes his head, jumps off the table and walks out.
The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry; but like I said, your parrot is most definitely dead."
Finally, the woman seems convinced.
The doctor turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill which he handed to the woman. The parrot's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$500!" she cried. "$500 just to tell me my bird is dead?!"
The vet shrugged. "If you'd taken my word for it, the bill would only have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, what do you expect?"
Nonsence, didn't you get the shirts yet?
When did I send them?