Flashaholicism banned by parents........

Mags

Flashlight Enthusiast
Joined
Oct 16, 2004
Messages
2,096
Location
NY
Today, my parents seemed to have enough with my flashlights. They banned it. Temporarily at least. What should I do? I cant frequent these forums that often now. My parents said no more for a while. To make it worse, they confiscated the few lights that I have. My Blue Micromag+MM, LB micra, HAIII X5 and some more. No it doesnt have anything to do with school. They just said that this isnt a hobby anymore, its an addiction. How can I change their thoughts? I didnt do anything out of the ordinary today at all. I just played with my lights for a while, and that was it. Perhaps I can tell them that I will go on some sort of emotional strike? Or eduacational strike? Obedience strike? I dont know what I am supposed to do. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/help.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/crazy.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/frown.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/icon23.gif
Even worsER, I have to visit CPF in secret.
 

Kiessling

Flashaholic
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Nov 26, 2002
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16,140
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Old World
Before doing anything at all, a proper analysis of your parent's reasons for their actions might be the wisest choice.
Usually parents aren't cruel and think well before making decisions that will most certainly hurt their kid.
So ... why did they do it? What got them worried enough to act like this? Try to do some reflections on this and try to see their point as well as yours.
Speak with them and discuss the problem, and go back to the thinking.
Only then you are ready for decisions and actions.
bernhard
 

Brad01

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Joined
Dec 31, 2004
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/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/awman.gif
Well, I'm about your age, and I would say find out what their intentions are regarding the continuation of your hobby, and definitly obey what they want you to do, as odd as it may seem.
If you are discovered doing stuff behind their back, the lights may not come back. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/mecry.gif
I wouldn't do any strike or get angry. That will only show them that you are "Too attached to your flashlights" (NOT what you want!)
Voice of experience: Compliance and an attempt at a "Good attitude" will get you farther than secrecy.
Brad
 

Brad01

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Dec 31, 2004
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Oh, and don't forget to mention that you aren"t obbsesed with pipe bombs or war axes or brass knuckles or handguns or...
 

leukos

Flashlight Enthusiast
Joined
Apr 8, 2004
Messages
3,467
Location
Indianapolis
Mags despiser,
It's got to be difficult being 12 years old and participating in a forum that is mostly adults. I say this because most CPF'ers situation is different in that they have an income and no parents setting their rules.
I think you should definately heed your parents. My situation might be similar in that sometimes my wife complains that I spend too much time on the internet and not enough time talking with her. Your parents may feel like your life is a little one sided or unbalanced. Probably a good number of CPF'ers need that kind of feedback.
Ask your parents why they are concerned about you. If they say you are spending too much $$$ or too much time on the internet, then try and make an agreement with them and stick to it. For example: set a budget for spending on your hobby that they can agree to. Or, agree to only be on the internet 30 minutes a day. Stick to it because trust is hard to gain and easy to lose. It will show them how mature you are. You may also find that your parents are almost as interesting and cool as flashlights. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif
 

jayflash

Flashlight Enthusiast
Joined
Oct 4, 2003
Messages
3,909
Location
Two Rivers, Wisconsin
Mag's, as Kiessling suggested, most parents aren't trying to be cruel (I certainly hope). As an old far#...who's still raising two children, may I suggest?...if you are doing well in school and not neglecting normal responsibilities, MAYBE your folks are making a mistake. Sometimes, we parents, goof.

If you are really being restricted because of your deep interest, well...that is wrong. If you are contributing, reasonably, to your family and don't have other problems then intense interest in any, healthy, hobby, should be encouraged.

Mags, I don't know the real details, and that's where the devil lies. My wife has been concerned because I've spent time intensely researching different topics. Then she realized that after learning enough info, I quit spending a lot of time on whatever subject..except flashlights and audio and... Maybe you scare your parents - you could end up smarter then they are about some subjects. Our ten year old knows everything. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif
 

IlluminatingBikr

Flashlight Enthusiast
Joined
Feb 26, 2003
Messages
2,320
Mags_Despair,

Maybe you should try and get your dad interested in flashlights. My dad always understand where I'm coming from when I want to spend money on lights.
 

redcar

Enlightened
Joined
Jul 9, 2004
Messages
250
Typing this as an uncle with much care and respect and some amount of humor...

Don't visit this site in secret!! Do as you're told! The quickest way out of a jam is to straighten up and fly right. I don't have kids, though my sister has 4 little critters with the oldest boy being 12. This sounds like one of his stories. "Uh.. like I didn't do anything, I have no idea." Ok... If they took your lights, they had a reason. Get a life, go outside, enjoy other hobbies, do your homework, or how about DO YOUR CHORES. Maybe you want too many lights. Offer to sell one or two to fund the next one. Man, I know your bummed, but buck up soldier, life will get better. When things cool down, ask them why the ban if you really don't know. I can tell you this, with my sister, her husband, or if they're with me, and they go on an obedience strike - KATY BAR THE DOOR. If doesn't mean anything to your age group, that means bad news.

Hang in there, this probably won't be permanent. I wish one of my nephews was a flashaholic, I would quite literaly 'light him up'. But alas, we don't seem to have that much in common. I have given all of them lights, but it didn't seem to take hold. Oh well...

Now sign off this board, do as you're told, and don't come back until you have the all clear!!

uncle redcar
 

Mags

Flashlight Enthusiast
Joined
Oct 16, 2004
Messages
2,096
Location
NY
I guess this will be my final post for a while /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/frown.gif. I will check my PMs though (Not that I get many). I wonder if they will ban my pen spinning...
 

beav

Newly Enlightened
Joined
Dec 15, 2004
Messages
28
Location
the hole
don't sweat it - there will be plenty of time for obsessing about flashlights later. Enjoy being a kid! And listen to your parents - they're just doing what they think is best...
 

NeonLights

Flashlight Enthusiast
Joined
Jan 18, 2003
Messages
1,493
Location
Ohio
Prove that its not an addiction. Walk away for a few months. A person can leave behind a hobby for a few months if need be (or longer) and come back to it. An addiction is much harder to leave behind. Listen to your parents, keep/regain their trust, and return to your flashlight "hobby" in a few months in moderation.

-Keith
 

Saaby

Flashaholic
Joined
Jun 17, 2002
Messages
7,447
Location
Utah
Hey it's ok. Even the best-intentioned of parents do wired things. Unfortunately you're at that time of life where you're under their control. Soon enough you'll be off dong your own thing and sometimes probably wishing they were still around to make the rules!

I'm a bit old than you and work, but I don't own my own car. Not cost-effective for me right now. For some reason, my mother insists on coming with my dad when they pick me up at night. Pisses me off to no end because it makes me feel about 2 years old, but honestly I don't own a car and the only other option is to walk, so I don't have a whole lot of control over the situation, so I just accept it (and occasionally act childish about it, which I'm not proud of) knowing that soon enough I'll be making the car payment, gas payment, mechanic bill, insurance, etc. etc.
 

sjb269

Newly Enlightened
Joined
Dec 9, 2004
Messages
29
Having something taken away is never a good feeling,however,imagine how fun it will be to rediscover all your lights when you get them back. Sounds like you have already recieved some sound advice.Good luck.
 

greenLED

Flashaholic
Joined
Mar 26, 2004
Messages
13,263
Location
La Tiquicia
I did not understand a lot of things my parents did until I became a father myself. Parents see their children's behaviors based on their own experiences and what they think it's best for them. Trust your parents, and always talk to them. Never, ever, ever, hide stuff from them or hide what you do. When they find out (trust me, they will), you will be in deep trouble and your parents won't trust you anymore (that is really bad, by the way).

Talk to your parents about the ban. Try to understand their reasons and don't argue with them or throw a tantrum because it won't get you anywhere. I see on a separate thread that you are looking for a job. EXCELLENT!!! Aside from earning your own money to spend, it'll teach you a lot of other things too.

You, know I'm an adult, and I also like lights. I do spend too much time on CPF now and then. But, as much as I like my flashlights, and as much as I want MORE!! they are just lights. I also don't have a lot of money and can't buy all the lights I want. But there is a difference between wanting something and needing something. We don't really *need* lights to be happy. There are more important things in life than lights. It's OK to like them, but it's not OK to be "possessed" by them. Find another hobby, or get enrolled in a martial arts program... do something else.

yikes... I just re-read this and I sound like my dad... /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/jpshakehead.gif I guess I'm old enough now...
 

MrBenchmark

Enlightened
Joined
Aug 31, 2004
Messages
616
Location
Dallas, TX
Unless there's some other part of this that you aren't telling us, like your grades are declining, your not doing things you should at home, you've developed a really UNHEALTHY attraction to flashlights, or you aren't communicating with other kids your age, spending all your time on this forum, then this has to be one of the most absurd things I've ever heard. Again, I don't know your situation, and I'm really sorry to hear this happened, but there just has to be more to this, or your parents are just being stupid.

You could, quite easily, obsess over every video game out there. Millions of kids do. You could develop a quite unhealthy fascination with Japanese animation. Heck, you could take up GOLF - that would probably cost more than your stock of flashlights.

If your parents are just tired of you talking about flashlights every waking minute, well, they better get used to it. For the next six years or so, you're going to talk about a LOT of stuff they probably don't much care for. Flashlights just happen to be one of the least offensive topics.

I'm sure your parents mean well - they mostly do and it's a lot harder job than it seems like when you are on receiving end of it. You'll find that out one day yourself, most likely.
 

Robban

Enlightened
Joined
Jul 6, 2004
Messages
849
Location
Sweden
Consider yourself lucky. Your parents are stopping you from becoming as sick as most of the people here. Your wallet will thank you! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif

(I didn't really have anything wise to add since previous posters took care of that /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif )
 

Mags

Flashlight Enthusiast
Joined
Oct 16, 2004
Messages
2,096
Location
NY
Yesterday, I tried making some sort of agreement with my parents.
For 2 months, I shall not speak of lights,
For 2 months, I shall not visit this forum,
For 2 months, my parents will keep my lights,
For 2 months, I will use a cheap, 2D incan for my general lighting purposes,
For 2 months, I will start acting "normal", (in their point of view)
For 2 months, no one here will see me unless it is for checking my PMs.
This is what I will do for 2 months. All I need is the "agreed" from my parents. Then, I will get my good ol' priveleges back. (my lights too)
 

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