Funny life happenings, any good story lately?

[codybene]

So one of my kids is having some calculus homework help with a tutor online that comes from this company called StudyPug, anyway, this particular lady came highly recommended because she has an excellent record with other students from my kid's school and since my kid is taking some AP examinations next year, the wife and I decided to start his path to them.

Anyway, last Thursday as the calculus help tutoring was going at full blast in the living room, I was with the wife preparing some dinner in the kitchen when suddenly we hear this LOUD music coming from our kid's computer and we instantly come and take a look. Well, the tutor was all disoriented herself and saying sorry a thousand times, you could see her running around her apartment through the camera like a beheaded chicken, closing all the windows (after they were closed you could still hear the bass strongly from whatever was going on out there).

So the tutor had to end the session because we could barely hear her with all that noise.
As it turns out, a careless neighbor arrived to her apartment complex (she has a ground unit) with a new set of mega subwoofers, seriously, the guy was showing off big time! and we could hear what I think was Sum 41 all out loud and he never stopped, the tutor sent us an apology through email explaining the situation... but I just couldn't stop myself from laughing at how the tutor was running to all her windows to the sound of Sum 41's "Still waiting" HAHAHA that was SOOO FUNNY to see... 🤣🤣🤣🤣

I mean we are talking about a super serious, tinny lady, very modestly dressed running like crazy around a room closing windows like hell was blasting over outside hahaha, ,,, I'm going to hell for sure LOL

I have been smiling about that for days now, and it reminded me of the punk rock I listened to in the early 2000s, so now I'm blasting Sum 41, Blink 182 and Green Day all day... man I miss those days, the wife and I used to have SO MUCH FUN

So tell me, what funny random stuff has happened to you lately?

 

[bykfixer]

My wife has one of those talking birds. The bird arrived with sounds from previous owners. So like every 3rd day I thought there was a low battery in a smoke detector or the microwave was beeping as if just gone done cooking. Open the front door and the bird would make a creaking door hinge sound just like in a horror movie.

As time went past the bird began to mimic us and our sounds. She chirps like a cardinal. When the phone rings she says "hello". She imitates the toilet flushing and the dishwasher.

It turns out the bird only likes my wife. After finding out by being bitten 3 times I decided me and the bird stay at least 6 feet apart. So in the evening Mrs Fixer puts the bird on the floor to walk laps around the kitchen etc. Now I walk 8 feet from the bird as she goes "phee-ew-eet" "come eer" chasing me around the house. I get laps in, she gets laps in. Win-win, right?

When I come home from work and come in doors the bird says in my voice "wut-up-bird"

So one night the wife and kids are with me in the den. In the distance the kids heard "achoo!" in my voice and "bless you" in my wife's boy. Everybody got a good laugh from that one.

I have a bird that thinks he can talk but he just squawks, sometimes annoying type. His name is Maglite. Sometimes when Maglite gets going the talking bird (Rudy) says "shut up Maglite"……

When the bird says "go lay down" the dogs go lay down. When she imitates the door bell the dogs go into 'see who's at the door' mode.

She whistles a song. What song I do not know but it's about 10 seconds of a song.

Fun with bird. Maglite does peck me on the cheek and make a kissing sound. And I let his wings grow and at times leave his cage open so he flies to whatever room I'm in. Hangs out for a bit then flies back to his cage.

 

[knucklegary]

Be careful when weather warms Maglite doesn't fly the coop with a door left open..
I had a list wandering parakeet fly through my rear patio door. He then circled the dining room and back out the door. Loud music was playing. Later was told this probably attracted him.. The bright green bird spent a good hour outside in my oak trees before leaving.. or a hawk had a snack

 

[bykfixer]

When the weather warms I'll clip his wings so he doesn't fly into a spinning ceiling fan blades.

He's our burglar alarm. Amazon dude drops off a package "chirp chirp". One of the kids comes over "chirp chirp", a stranger walks past the house "chirp chirp". And at times he thinks he's a helicopter but he's not and crashes nearly everytime he tries it. "Where's Maglite?" "Oh he's behind the sofa where he tried to hover land and missed".Next thing you know up pops the green bird as if to say "tadah, made it".

 

[codybene]

My wife has one of those talking birds. The bird arrived with sounds from previous owners. So like every 3rd day I thought there was a low battery in a smoke detector or the microwave was beeping as if just gone done cooking. Open the front door and the bird would make a creaking door hinge sound just like in a horror movie.

As time went past the bird began to mimic us and our sounds. She chirps like a cardinal. When the phone rings she says "hello". She imitates the toilet flushing and the dishwasher.

It turns out the bird only likes my wife. After finding out by being bitten 3 times I decided me and the bird stay at least 6 feet apart. So in the evening Mrs Fixer puts the bird on the floor to walk laps around the kitchen etc. Now I walk 8 feet from the bird as she goes "phee-ew-eet" "come eer" chasing me around the house. I get laps in, she gets laps in. Win-win, right?

When I come home from work and come in doors the bird says in my voice "wut-up-bird"

So one night the wife and kids are with me in the den. In the distance the kids heard "achoo!" in my voice and "bless you" in my wife's boy. Everybody got a good laugh from that one.

I have a bird that thinks he can talk but he just squawks, sometimes annoying type. His name is Maglite. Sometimes when Maglite gets going the talking bird (Rudy) says "shut up Maglite"……

When the bird says "go lay down" the dogs go lay down. When she imitates the door bell the dogs go into 'see who's at the door' mode.

She whistles a song. What song I do not know but it's about 10 seconds of a song.

Fun with bird. Maglite does peck me on the cheek and make a kissing sound. And I let his wings grow and at times leave his cage open so he flies to whatever room I'm in. Hangs out for a bit then flies back to his cage.

WOW!!! I had no idea talking birds could also imitate random sounds like flushing the toilet or the dishwasher..... I thought they only could imitate human voices and animals..... the "creaking hinge door" sound takes the big prize to me.. OMG I would get chills big time, I imagine myself at 3:00am coming out of the bathroom and getting back to bed and then start hearing all these scary door sounds xD

omg, sounds like you have a very interesting situation going on in your home

 

[PhotonWrangler]

WOW!!! I had no idea talking birds could also imitate random sounds like flushing the toilet or the dishwasher..... I thought they only could imitate human voices and animals..... the "creaking hinge door" sound takes the big prize to me.. OMG I would get chills big time, I imagine myself at 3:00am coming out of the bathroom and getting back to bed and then start hearing all these scary door sounds xD

omg, sounds like you have a very interesting situation going on in your home

There was a mockingbird in our area that did a perfect imitation of an 80's car alarm, the one that sounds like an owl on an acid trip. He even got the sounds in the right order.

 

[bykfixer]

I heard a mocking bird doing a celphone ring tone once. Sounded just like one too.

Our birds go to bed at 9pm each night so if I roam the house at 2am I might hear Maglite pecking at the hanging bells in his cage he pecks at times and Rudy saying "what?" but as a rule they sleep when we sleep.

Now one time we needed to give our dog a pill that she did not want to eat. So I placed peanut butter on a saltine, then squished the pill into the peanut butter. "Comeer fido"……she opened her mouth and I shoved the peanut butter against the roof of her mouth. That dog enjoyed the snack but the peanut butter stuck to the roof of her mouth was freaking her out.

Dog licking frantically, eyes all buldging out, head all bobing around like a bobblehead, for like an hour. Then for kicks and giggles it was time to do it with the other dogs. For like an hour there were three dogs all standing near each other, tails wagging licking their faces just as happy but at the same time frustrated that darn peanut butter was stuck to the roof of their mouth.

It was pretty funny. One day on the Dennis Miller radio show he said "bored on a Friday night, give your dog a peanut butter covered cracker, but be prepared to laugh until your side hurts".

 

[PhotonWrangler]

I heard a mocking bird doing a celphone ring tone once. Sounded just like one too.

Our birds go to bed at 9pm each night so if I roam the house at 2am I might hear Maglite pecking at the hanging bells in his cage he pecks at times and Rudy saying "what?" but as a rule they sleep when we sleep.

Now one time we needed to give our dog a pill that she did not want to eat. So I placed peanut butter on a saltine, then squished the pill into the peanut butter. "Comeer fido"……she opened her mouth and I shoved the peanut butter against the roof of her mouth. That dog enjoyed the snack but the peanut butter stuck to the roof of her mouth was freaking her out.

Dog licking frantically, eyes all buldging out, head all bobing around like a bobblehead, for like an hour. Then for kicks and giggles it was time to do it with the other dogs. For like an hour there were three dogs all standing near each other, tails wagging licking their faces just as happy but at the same time frustrated that darn peanut butter was stuck to the roof of their mouth.

It was pretty funny. One day on the Dennis Miller radio show he said "bored on a Friday night, give your dog a peanut butter covered cracker, but be prepared to laugh until your side hurts".

Lol. I can picture the dogs going "moof moof"

 

[Poppy]

I went to a all proceeds go to handicapped children charity, Halloween party, Saturday night. I suspected but didn't really know, but there was going to be a "Drag Queen" show that night. Well, it was funny, and the hall was filled more with Drag Queens than others. They did put on a good show of dancing and lip synching, and just general comedy.

Well I wasn't getting dressed up, but my daughter shamed me into some kind of a costume. So I went to my room and grabbed a flowered lay I had gotten at a Luau party. I'd go as a Hawaiian Tourist. After getting a beer I walked over to a couple, just to chat.

So these two ladies, asked me if I got laid?
I said, "No."
They asked, "Do you want to get laid?"

I was so surprised, I didn't know how to respond. Was I being propositioned? Or were they joking around?

I would have loved to see the look on my face.
I think my response was something along the lines of "humina humina".

 

[SCEMan]

Went on a cruise last month from Toronto thru the St. Lawrence Seaway to Ft Lauderdale and met a gentleman (could have been my older brother) who was born and raised in the same small town in the San Gabriel Valley in CA that I was. Went to my elementary school and high school too! Talk about small world...

 

[Chauncey Gardener]

I went to a all proceeds go to handicapped children charity, Halloween party, Saturday night. I suspected but didn't really know, but there was going to be a "Drag Queen" show that night. Well, it was funny, and the hall was filled more with Drag Queens than others. They did put on a good show of dancing and lip synching, and just general comedy.

Well I wasn't getting dressed up, but my daughter shamed me into some kind of a costume. So I went to my room and grabbed a flowered lay I had gotten at a Luau party. I'd go as a Hawaiian Tourist. After getting a beer I walked over to a couple, just to chat.

So these two ladies, asked me if I got laid?
I said, "No."
They asked, "Do you want to get laid?"

I was so surprised, I didn't know how to respond. Was I being propositioned? Or were they joking around?

I would have loved to see the look on my face.
I think my response was something along the lines of "humina humina".

Both came dressed as Layla. Poppy's not dumb but he don't understand why they walked like a woman but talked like a man.

 

[Poppy]

Both came dressed as Layla. Poppy's not dumb but he don't understand why they walked like a woman but talked like a man.

One was dressed as the Evil woman in the 101 Dalmations, another as Marilyn Monroe, and the one dressed as Barbie, had the deepest voice I ever heard. LOL.

 

[Chauncey Gardener]

One was dressed as the Evil woman in the 101 Dalmations, another as Marilyn Monroe, and the one dressed as Barbie, had the deepest voice I ever heard. LOL.

That happens to me ... Doom music starts playing in my head .. telling my feet and legs to RUN!

 

[PhotonWrangler]

That happens to me ... Doom music starts playing in my head .. telling my feet and legs to RUN!

Wow. Was that an electric... harp?

 

[PhotonWrangler]

I went to a all proceeds go to handicapped children charity, Halloween party, Saturday night. I suspected but didn't really know, but there was going to be a "Drag Queen" show that night. Well, it was funny, and the hall was filled more with Drag Queens than others. They did put on a good show of dancing and lip synching, and just general comedy.

Well I wasn't getting dressed up, but my daughter shamed me into some kind of a costume. So I went to my room and grabbed a flowered lay I had gotten at a Luau party. I'd go as a Hawaiian Tourist. After getting a beer I walked over to a couple, just to chat.

So these two ladies, asked me if I got laid?
I said, "No."
They asked, "Do you want to get laid?"

I was so surprised, I didn't know how to respond. Was I being propositioned? Or were they joking around?

I would have loved to see the look on my face.
I think my response was something along the lines of "humina humina".

I think that anyone wearing a Hawaiian lay at a party should expect to run across that joke sooner or later.