Great post! So many things you wrote are true. I've heard it all about marriage and kids (with my answers in brackets).Absolutely true! And, one of the biggest reasons why I never got married (though not the only one) is that in modern-times, marriage has zero benefits for men. You could put a massive amount of effort into a marriage, and one day out of the blue get blind-sided by your spouse who decides, "Hmm, I could do better."
She leaves, takes your children with her. Courts side with her, literally simply due to her gender. And, not only can you not do anything about it, but you have to pay alimony and child support. Think about it. She leaves, turns your world upside down. Devastates you, and your children, AND.... You then get the privilege of paying her to do so! Yeah, no; I'm not participating in that type of lunacy!
Some will say that doesn't happen to every guy. Happens to just over 50%. So your odds are literally worse than a coin flip. Some will say, well; you do get children out of it. Honestly, take a good long look at what happened to the founder of U-Haul. That is a man who absolutely would have been better off not having children. Again, you get zero guarantees that your children will love or respect you. Even if you raise them properly.
Don't you want to leave behind something of yourself after your gone? (If I'm dead why would I care? Besides, I hope in my lifetime we find the means to conquer aging and death so I *never* die.)
Don't you want someone there in your old age? (My mom was in a rehab place/nursing home for over 10 weeks. I saw lots of old people there with kids who never visited them, much less took care of them. Having kids or a wife is no guarantee you won't grow old alone.)
EDIT: I just remembered a nice little tidbit from that rehab place. One of the residents (or more accurately inmates) complained to me about his kids never visiting him. Then he asks me do you have kids of your own? I said no. He says you really owe it to yourself to have kids so you're not alone in your old age. I was ready to do a face plant.
You'll miss out seeing all the wonder in their eyes as their growing up. (Perhaps, but it'll be easier for me to remain young at heart, and see a lot more wonder in my own eyes as I life a live I couldn't possibly live being responsible for a wife and children. I'd rather live a life I love than live one vicariously through children.)
Don't you want to have people in your life who love you? (Again, no guarantees your children will love you, or your wife will continue to love you. Besides, if you really want unconditional love you're better off with a dog or a cat. They're a lot less expensive, and frankly a lot more joy to have in your life.)
There's actually a lot more than those:
2. Because someone expects you to (and it doesn't matter who).
https://wehavekids.com/parenting/10-Reasons-to-Have-Kids (I really hope a lot the reasons in this one are satire)
Yeah, these ideas of marriage and having double digits of children are straight from a long dead era. To add to what you wrote, let's not forget the absolutely horrendous number of women who died in childbirth back then. By the time you might cranked out ten kids, you were probably on your third wife at least because the first two died in childbirth.And, this is coming from a Christian. Though admittedly, I am different. Having a massive amount of children made sense in an era when most of them didn't live much longer beyond their first Birthday, or died days after birth. Having nine children made sense back then because it meant you were playing the odds. Have nine, maybe one or two would survive to become adults. Nowadays, you get some devout members of the church who have nine or 12 children, they all survive; and become a major financial burden on the family as a whole. Brilliant!
Truth is, I keep my guard up around my fellow Christians. The vast majority have an attitude of "I'm saved!" So they treat non-Christians as if they're a lower form of life. Or, they believe that their righteous indignation is all the justification they need to commit the worst acts you can imagine! Or, that if you're a man, you MUST get married. Again, great idea.... for a long dead era. Like having massive numbers of children. I'd never intentionally shoot myself through the top of both feet, and I'd never intentionally get married. Literally zero benefits to doing both. But both come with horrible disadvantages. Get married, work yourself into misery like a slave for people who likely won't appreciate your sacrifices. Why?
Sad to say, most other religions are similar in their thinking to Christianity. In a nutshell, they relegate men to ATMs to provide for their family, and women to baby factories.