rip dad

[raggie33]

its a long night im afraid to sleep. i just am not able to cope

 

[Silly Rabbit]

You mentioned your family is coming together now a bit? Are you getting closer to them?

 

[raggie33]

sadly i haven't been responding to there text as i should just dont have it in me right now. but i never been a social butterfly more like a social dragonfly

 

[Silly Rabbit]

Don't knock yourself down. They could be trying to reach out to you, you may be surprised how poitive your interaction with them may be. Any anxiety about them may fall when you see their feelings, they could be a huge comfort to you? And you them.

 

[bykfixer]

sadly i haven't been responding to there text as i should just dont have it in me right now. but i never been a social butterfly more like a social dragonfly

Just be honest with them. Say "thanks, but I really need some time alone in my batcave".....otherwise they may be knocking on your door "hey man, you ok?"....

 

[sween1911]

Hey @raggie33 hope you're getting through the holidays brother. We're thinking of you.

 

[raggie33]

ty its not easy i suck at communicating m thoughts. never had that abilty im a bit better verbaly. but i for sure cant talk to anyone loseing both parents so cloe to christmas . mom died christmas day dad a few days ago.. i havent been happy for years many days i didnt leave my bed then dadd passed away

 

[scalpel_ninja]

I lost my mom around this time too. December 28, 2020 to be exact.

 

[bykfixer]

I felt like an orphan at first then one day realized my folks had spent years preparing me for the day I replaced them.

You're the grown up now Raggie.

 

[raggie33]

i swear this is a true story i lost my faverite flashligh the day before or the day he passed i looked alll over trully all over i figured i had it cliped on pants and it fell off on my way to store. but i woke up a few moments ago i walk in my room where i looked a million time i see something that looked like a flashlight it was my flashlight right there so easy to see i should of stepped on it im happy but scared.i dont think i even told anyone i lost it. i loose so many of them

 

[raggie33]

ps any ideas how i can not loose it again? it has a decent clip

 

[PhotonWrangler]

ps any ideas how i can not loose it again? it has a decent clip

If you have an iPhone, attach an Airtag to it.

 

[raggie33]

it is dawning on me ill never get to speak to him again i try not to think bout it

 

[knucklegary]

It's been 15 yrs since my pop died. There isn't a day goes by I don't miss him or want his advice for something.
That hollow orphaned feeling will diminish as time passes.
Your Dad is always near when you need him.
I talk to mine all the time, well, not out in public (-;

 

[sween1911]

Raggie,

It's the first week of a New Year! Sending good vibes out to you today!

 

[raggie33]

Every day it gets worse last few years for me been pretty rough .but I at least had my father to talk to.

 

[Poppy]

Every day it gets worse last few years for me been pretty rough .but I at least had my father to talk to.

You have family members reaching out to you. If you want someone to talk to, perhaps it is time to let them back into your life.

I don't want to engage you in conversation, about this, just saying... that it may be time to put your big boy pants on. Take some positive steps towards healing from your loss. Wallowing in self pity, isn't positive, it only deepens the hole you put yourself into.

 

[raggie33]

I don't think we all greive the same way poppy we all have different life's or coping skills .

 

[Monocrom]

Every day it gets worse last few years for me been pretty rough .but I at least had my father to talk to.

Very sorry to hear that.
Okay.... Not perfect, but there's an online therapy site, betterhelp.com if you really need someone to talk to. And I mean a site with actual therapists. Don't know a ton about the site.

Bit of perspective. I have an ASMR channel on YouTube. Actually been part of the ASMR community for many years. Even before I started my channel. I can conclusively say two things. One, for some bizarre reason, the absolute vast majority of women who do ASMR; look quite a few years younger than they are. I don't mean like 3 or 5 years. Closer to 10, easy. However, along with that odd Fountain Of Youth effect, comes a huge issue. Normal girls/women simply don't do ASMR. All have mental health issues to varying degrees. Some of whom have very seriously hurt themselves.... and were open and honest about it on their channels.

While I personally never used Better Help. A lot of those young women have. They've talked about that site. A couple of times, they were paid promotions. But the vast majority were not. They found help through the site. Only one individual had a negative experience. But over the course of four years, I got to know Lisa on a very personal basis. She's a miserable, selfish excuse for a human-being who relies on her looks and extremely charming personality to get what she wants. She uses people to a horrible degree. Which is even worse because I'm forced to admit she is the most charming person I've ever met. We're talking cult leader levels of dangerous charm. Sorry, got a bit off track. But yeah, since you're struggling; might be worth it to check out that website.

Normally I don't give free advertising in my posts on CPF. But under the circumstances, I hope the Mods. and Admins. will be understanding about it this one time.

 

[raggie33]

Ty I'll check that out . They say the best way to die is in your sleep. Dad didn't go that way was pretty rough way to go