Aging

Empath

Flashaholic
Joined
Nov 11, 2001
Messages
8,508
Location
Oregon
Current economic conditions create strange times. For years I've been a public employee, working beyond the time I could retire with full benefits. Usually one can assume that the longer they work, the larger the pension. Unfortunately, our state is eyeballing the state pension system, trying to decide if they might win in court to lessen that which has been previously granted. Experts on both sides swear that opposing views are correct. The most secure arrangement is to be retired, with the state locked into the arrangement. I always thought retirement would be enjoyable, but as it nears and stares me in the face, I realize that I am accustomed to equating a living with the wages of work. I know I've earned benefits, but this sure seems different. It's not too unlike the first dive from the high board. It's scary, and you approach it with apprehension, even though you've dreamed of the result. Could it be that retirement is a dream for youth?

Ah, well.
........................

Aging - By George Carlin

Do you realize the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids?
If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions. "How old are you?" I'm four and a half!" You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five!

That's the key. You get into your teens, now they
can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.
"How old are you?" "I'm gonna be 16!" You could be 13, but hey, you are going to be 16.
And then the greatest day of your life...you become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony... YOU BECOME 21 ...YESSSS!!!

But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there?
Makes you sound like bad milk. He TURNED, we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?

You BECOME 21, you TURN 30... then you're PUSHING 40.

Whoa! Put on the brakes, It's all slipping away!!!
Before you know it, you REACH 50... and your dreams are gone.

But wait, you MAKE IT to 60 You didn't think you
would!

So you:
BECOME 21
TURN 30
PUSH 40
REACH 50
and
MAKE IT to 60.

You've built up so much speed that you... HIT 70!

After that it's a day-by-day thing; You HIT
Wednesday!

You get into your 80s and every day is a complete
cycle:
You HIT lunch
You TURN 4:30
You REACH bedtime.
 

The_LED_Museum

*Retired*
Joined
Aug 12, 2000
Messages
19,414
Location
Federal Way WA. USA
I think George Carlin had it right.
Once you turn 30, things start to break, you get these little pains that you never had before, and you start to notice grey where none existed before. You actively seek out golf on TV instead of making every effort to avoid it. And you start shopping for vitamins that have the word "Silver" in the name.
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Just a few days ago, I was about to shave and noticed the dreaded "salt & pepper" coloration beginning to show in my facial hair for the first time. It wasn't that way a few weeks earlier the last time I really examined my hair in any detail. It's still too inconspicuous to rush to the store for "Grecian Formula" or "Just For Men" beard & moustache colorant, but it's inescapable nonetheless, and only going to become more noticeable as the years tick on by. Time to start shopping for a better electric shaver. Chop those grey suckers off so close nobody will see them.
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leddite

Enlightened
Joined
Jun 27, 2002
Messages
356
Location
NuEnglandia
hey, nothing wrong with centrum silver - it's been rated a top notch multivitamin...

and pretty much everyone should be taking a multivitamin everyday
smile.gif
[religion] cuz modern processed food sucketh and you wanna live longer, right?
tongue.gif


i didn't take up any of my current fun hobbies until i was over 30... motorcycling, downhill longboard slalom skateboard, snowboarding, surfing, kickboxing. no golf in there. nooooOOOooooo, nope. none. nada. no golfing. noooOOOoooooo. i realize i am mortal after all
grin.gif
 
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