Compulsive Liars

Anyone know someone who is a compulsive liar? Someone who will lie about things that they are going to get caught because it's so dumb that it is inevitable.

My brother has dated one for 4 years. I don't know if he realizes it or not. You would have to think so but why would he stay with her if he knew? She's the type of person who will lie about someone to start trouble. We have a close nit group of friends and everyone knows how she is and nobody can stand her. It has caused me not to be as close to him as I used to because I can't stand to be around her.

Early on a couple of us confronted her about something she had said about someone and she went storming off so then we opened up to him about everything we could think of at the time. Nothing has ever been said since. I feel I need to keep my mouth shut to not jeopardize my relationship with my brother. If I where to say something she is going to lie to him about it. He's obviously in love and must be blind to it. My parents and family members can't stand her either. It really sucks to say the least.

Hope I didn't babble to much. Just needed to get it off my chest.

Re: Compulsive Lairs

liar

Re: Compulsive Lairs

sbebenelli,

Sounds like a bad situation indeed. And it sounds like all you can do is hope that your brother comes around and doesn't end up getting burned too badly. Sorry to hear about it.

As for compulsive liars I've met, the closest I've seen to that is andrewwynrouse (AWR), but I've never met him in person.

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aljsk8 said:

liar

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I bring up a subject that is obviously a problem for me you felt a need to say this? :thumbsdow

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I've been in a similar position, except with a friend since childhood, and his girlfriend is the reason there are instructions on bubble gum packages and thinks she's ALWAYS right.

You've explained it to your brother and he's made his choice. There's nothing else you can do but hope he comes around before he gets burnt bad. If your brother and his girlfriend are happy together, then wish them further and continued happiness, but don't let it affect your life any more than it absolutely has to. Good luck.

:buddies:

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This seems to fall into the category of "what on earth makes some people choose their particular partners". One of my cousins married a girl who was as dumb as all heck, and a compulsive liar besides. Of course, her lies were easy to see through, consisting of saying things like she was "almost pregnant" (funny but I always thought pregnancy was a binary condition-either you are or you're not). Thankfully, after a few years they split up. Now at least he's with someone a little better (at least his new wife isn't a moron).

I don't understand why your brother is staying with "miss lies like a rug", but unfortunately all you can do is grin and bear it. Sooner or later he'll have enough of her, and be rid of her. Is there any particular reason he's overlooking her obvious flaws? Is she particularly attractive, or maybe has money in the family? Not that it makes it any better, but at least the situation might make more sense in that light. In my cousin's case his wife was not only dumb and a liar, but not particularly attractive, and certainly not wealthy. I guess I understand even less why smart guys hook up with females who are dumb as opposed to liars.

I also remember one of my friends who hooked up with someone from the Ukraine who was obviously just looking to get her citizenship through marriage. Thankfully that ended after a year or so. Everyone except him saw it. I guess love really is blind (and deaf and dumb).

Re: Compulsive Lairs

jtr1962 said:

. . . I guess I understand even less why smart guys hook up with females who are dumb as opposed to liars.

. . .

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jtr1962,

Do you really mean this? You'd say marrying a liar is more understandable than marrying someone who isn't "smart"?

You can't mean that, can you?

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jtr1962 said:

Is there any particular reason he's overlooking her obvious flaws? Is she particularly attractive, or maybe has money in the family?

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She has a nice body and some I'm sure some would say she is attractive. I don't find her attractive myself but knowing her might make me one sided.

As far as money goes she told us her grandma had a huge trust for her when she turned 25. That came and went. :shrug:

I left this part out but you had brought it up. She is not very intelligent either. She's down right dumb. That makes this even harder to understand.

I also didn't mention this but they had a kid together about a year ago so there is no good outcome to this. She has no common since as a parent either. Does and says really dumb things. For example the baby's head was getting deformed from always laying it on the same side. The doctor told her to keep her off that side and her comment to my mom was you won't see it when she has hair. :shakehead

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js said:

jtr1962,

Do you really mean this? You'd say marrying a liar is more understandable than marrying someone who isn't "smart"?

You can't mean that, can you?

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Neither is obviously desireable, but at least if you can see through a compulsive liar's lies eventually they might start to be a bit more honest, at least with you, since their game no longer works. However, I can't think of any way to make someone whose IQ is fairly low match that of a much more intelligent partner. And to some extent I've found the amount of lying actually increases with intelligence. I guess the reason is smart people can often get away with lying. Just look at Congress, for example. :devil: So basically, yes, I could put up with a liar more than a moron if I had to choose one. The truth often comes through in people's lies anyway. But like I said the person would have to have a lot of saving graces for me to put up with chronic lying. Chances are they wouldn't as lying is a often symptom of low self-esteem.

Re: Compulsive Lairs

sbebenelli said:

I left this part out but you had brought it up. She is not very intelligent either. She's down right dumb. That makes this even harder to understand.

I also didn't mention this but they had a kid together about a year ago so there is no good outcome to this. She has no common since as a parent either. Does and says really dumb things. For example the baby's head was getting deformed from always laying it on the same side. The doctor told her to keep her off that side and her comment to my mom was you won't see it when she has hair. :shakehead

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They had kid together???? This is really, really bad. Based on what you wrote, if I were that doctor I would intervene with child services so at least the kid could be put in a decent home. I can't believe how ignorant this woman is. Your brother can do what he wants with his life, but this seems like a really poor environment to bring a child up in.

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psychopathology is everywhere from the gutter to the presidency..I don't think there is anything you can do about it, it makes the world go 'round, and seems to increase with population..

try to steer clear.

Re: Compulsive Lairs

aljsk8 said:

liar

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sbebenelli said:

I bring up a subject that is obviously a problem for me you felt a need to say this? :thumbsdow

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I don't think he's calling you a "liar" - just pointing out a minor spelling error...eh?

Re: Compulsive Lairs

sbebenelli said:

Anyone know someone who is a compulsive lair? Someone who will lie about things that they are going to get caught because it's so dumb that it is inevitable.

My brother has dated one for 4 years. I don't know if he realizes it or not. You would have to think so but why would he stay with her if he knew? She's the type of person who will lie about someone to start trouble. We have a close nit group of friends and everyone knows how she is and nobody can stand her. It has caused me not to be as close to him as I used to because I can't stand to be around her.

Early on a couple of us confronted her about something she had said about someone and she went storming off so then we opened up to him about everything we could think of at the time. Nothing has ever been said since. I feel I need to keep my mouth shut to not jeopardize my relationship with my brother. If I where to say something she is going to lie to him about it. He's obviously in love and must be blind to it. My parents and family members can't stand her either. It really sucks to say the least.

Hope I didn't babble to much. Just needed to get it off my chest.

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So as I understand the story your brother is dating Hillary Clinton. While I feel your pain, you might get more exposure for your brother's extreme problem by contacting Fox News.

Re: Compulsive Lairs

Sigman said:

I don't think he's calling you a "liar" - just pointing out a minor spelling error...eh?

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I thought it was meant as a joke. At least I hope so, I found it funny and laughed.

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it was the spelling mistake i was pointing out

so sorry

but in the right context this could also be a joke - it wasnt

take it how you like depending who you are

Alex

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Yes in all fairness I when I first read the title I thought it was something totally different like maybe a computer game (aka Dragon's Lair). I believe you can edit and change the spelling in your title?

Sigman said:

I don't think he's calling you a "liar" - just pointing out a minor spelling error...eh?

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Re: Compulsive Lairs

sbebenelli said:

I also didn't mention this but they had a kid together about a year ago so there is no good outcome to this. She has no common since as a parent either. Does and says really dumb things. For example the baby's head was getting deformed from always laying it on the same side. The doctor told her to keep her off that side and her comment to my mom was you won't see it when she has hair. :shakehead

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As a fairly new father, this made me feel really bad for the child. But maybe the child is the reason your brother is sticking with her.

Apparently many couples postpone their divorces or break-ups "for the sake of the kids", even if it would really be better for the children if they didn't have to listen to the fighting every day and night. Didn't happen to me, but a friend of mine once told me, that he spent most of his childhood praying that his parents would get a divorce. And they did, but only after he had moved away from home.

Re: Compulsive Lairs

aljsk8 said:

it was the spelling mistake i was pointing out

so sorry

but in the right context this could also be a joke - it wasnt

take it how you like depending who you are

Alex

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OK I understand now. I didn't catch that I had spelled it wrong. And here I was saying how dumb she was.

Re: Compulsive Lairs

Valolammas said:

As a fairly new father, this made me feel really bad for the child. But maybe the child is the reason your brother is sticking with her.

Apparently many couples postpone their divorces or break-ups "for the sake of the kids", even if it would really be better for the children if they didn't have to listen to the fighting every day and night. Didn't happen to me, but a friend of mine once told me, that he spent most of his childhood praying that his parents would get a divorce. And they did, but only after he had moved away from home.

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I don't think he is staying with her because of the kid. He seemed happy before they had the kid.

Re: Compulsive Lairs

jtr1962 said:

They had kid together???? This is really, really bad. Based on what you wrote, if I were that doctor I would intervene with child services so at least the kid could be put in a decent home. I can't believe how ignorant this woman is. Your brother can do what he wants with his life, but this seems like a really poor environment to bring a child up in.

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The child is well taken care of. My brother is a fine dad and she might say dumb things I don't see any danger the child is in. We have a close family and would never let it get to the point where the kid was in danger.