Reminds me of a bogus lab report a small group of us turned in to our biology instructor many years ago (about 40?). This was in addition to our REAL labs, and just as a sort of tongue-in-cheek for our instructor. He enjoyed it.
I'll have to set this up just a bit first, by reminding you that the testing done on animals to see if a chemical is dangerous is often (usually) done using incredible overdoses to hurry the process along. Things like giving lab animals 500 to 3000 times the "normal" dose/exposure by weight.
What we did was to make up a short series of lab tests to check on the toxicity of DHMO - Dihydromonoxide (pure distilled water).
To make a long story short, we reported that the experiment had to be terminated after the chemical was found to be "fatal when ingested" and "therefore extremely toxic" to 32 of the 32 mice on hand for the project: Every one of them had spontaneously exploded at some point when being force-fed the initial 1000X daily dose of the DHMO. (Essentially trying to force about a pint of water into each mouse IIRC ... )
The findings of the project, of course, included that ingesting water, even pure distilled water, was 100 percent fatal to mice, and therefore water was highly poisonous, and probably should not be ingested by humans until further tests could be made to confirm or deny it's extreme toxicity.
Etc., etc.
(In reality, no mice were harmed in our testing, there WAS no testing and in fact one of the, uh, "test subjects" ended up living in a nice terrarium at my place for several years - Priscilla was a nice little mouse ... )
-= MICROSOFT FREE ZONE =-