Why do you need two torches in the car when you always carry one in your pocket ?

"Why do you need two torches in the car when you always carry one in your pocket ?" , she said , "And why is there at least one torch in every room ?" ... " You can't use them all at the same time !"

"Not even a wealthy caterpillar would need over 100 pairs of shoes" I replied ... "And , why do you need dozens of handbags (purses) when you've only got two hands ?"

"Thats different" she said ... "The shoes and handbags are in different colours to go with my different outfits."

"Well it's the same with me" , I said , "I have some stainless torches and some black ones and the lovely sand coloured Solarforces ... And , I might need some in grey , red , blue , gold and purple. "

"You can have the one you bought me to carry" , she said , "It's in my bedside drawer"

I sort of gave up after that.

I have decided to keep to the stainless and the black and the sand coloured torches now , as she would notice if other colours crept into my collection ... This way , I can add extra essentials without her knowing.

Snag is that my two Grandsons are into torches and would give the game away ... I just couldn't get new torches without showing them ... I will have to tell them to keep it a secret that can only be discussed when no women are present.

I should have just kept my old motorbikes ... I had to take them out regularly to exercise them (a bit like my torches) ... Unfortunately , I was offered silly prices for my Velocette Clubman and my Velocette Thruxton and I couldn't refuse ... Ditto with my Triumph and Norton.

Strangely , my Wife didn't seem to mind when I spent thousands on bikes.

So , why the problem with torches ? ... I've only got twelve ! ... So far.

I quite fancy a Maratac AAA but don't know where to get one at a sensible price ... Unfortunately that would make thirteen torches so I would also need another one , as thirteen is an unlucky number.

If this collecting carries on , I will be forced to join "Flashaholics Unanimous" for help in my addiction.
.

What addiction? You are being completely reasonable.

march.brown said:

"Why do you need two torches in the car when you always carry one in your pocket ?"

Click to expand...

It would be needed if the car breaks down while you are carrying a couple of passengers driving through an area with no mobile phone reception.

march.brown said:

"And why is there at least one torch in every room ?" ... " You can't use them all at the same time !"

Click to expand...

Clearly having a torch in every room is necessary because if the lights go out it is difficult to navigate to other rooms.

Ahhhhh yes.
I'm afraid the signs are present!
Most addicts try to hide/deny thier addiction.
You've only been with us 6 months - It gets worse!
I only ride my bicycles early in the morning so I have an excuse to build lights for them.

As I always say to my wife when she comments on how many lights I've got (and not that many really), she's lucky I'm not into cars.

I actually have a practical reason for having a flashlight in my glovebox. It's so that the wife would have access to a decent light if anything happens with the car and I'm not with her. She has a cheap keychain push button light and a cheap twisty AAA light but there is not that much light being pushed out by those so I keep a more powerful light that also has and SOS mode in the car.

Also, it's for the 1 time in 200 that I forget to grab my lights...it just makes sense to keep atleast 1 light in the car

march.brown said:

"Why do you need two torches in the car when you always carry one in your pocket ?" , she said , "And why is there at least one torch in every room ?" ... " You can't use them all at the same time !"

"Not even a wealthy caterpillar would need over 100 pairs of shoes" I replied ... "And , why do you need dozens of handbags (purses) when you've only got two hands ?".

Click to expand...

So, it appears that you used her madness to justify your own. What argument are you going to use when asked the same question by a more sensible woman that only owns two pairs of shoes and one handbag?

march.brown said:

"Not even a wealthy caterpillar would need over 100 pairs of shoes" I replied ... "And , why do you need dozens of handbags (purses) when you've only got two hands ?"

Click to expand...

I have been laughing at that for the last 5 minutes.



I always hear "you spent $_____ on a flashlight?!?!?!?"

I have found the more I own the less she is likely to notice a new one in my stash.

I have just a few more than you George as I collect by theme,I buy only small single cell lights in general but have a couple of double cells in the collection and now started to find more uses for them rather than shelf queens to give them all some usage when I can.

Latest idea was to stick a small flat magnet to my Gerber Firecracker and fix a small flat magnet to the underside of my wall mounted kitchen cupboard above the area where I make my coffee/tea etc,makes nice ambient lighting in the evening rather than use the tubed lighting in my kitchen just to make myself a hot drink.

JaguarDave-in-Oz said:

What argument are you going to use when asked the same question by a more sensible woman that only owns two pairs of shoes and one handbag?

Click to expand...

I don't know any sensible women like that ... I'm 72 and I don't suppose that I will ever find a sensible woman now ... I've had a lot of Wifes (three of them my own) and none of them had that few pairs of shoes and handbags.

My latest Wife is no different to any of the others ... I'm just glad that there have only been three "officially owned" Wifes in my life.

I'm gonna stick with this one now ... I couldn't afford to "refit" another one unless I got another that was the same size.
.

Only 2?

mcnair55 said:

I have just a few more than you George as I collect by theme,I buy only small single cell lights in general but have a couple of double cells in the collection and now started to find more uses for them rather than shelf queens to give them all some usage when I can.

Latest idea was to stick a small flat magnet to my Gerber Firecracker and fix a small flat magnet to the underside of my wall mounted kitchen cupboard above the area where I make my coffee/tea etc, makes nice ambient lighting in the evening rather than use the tubed lighting in my kitchen just to make myself a hot drink.

Click to expand...

Hi Bill ... I assume that you are not married ... Making your own coffee (for example).

I do make my own hot chocolate though ... But that's because I don't want her to know how many spoonfuls of chocolate that I put in the mug.

When I read your opening few words ("I have just a few more than you") , I thought you meant Wifes ... Then I read further and saw you meant torches.

By the way , I've just ordered an iTP A3 stainless to go with my A2 stainless ... I'm trying to find a Maratac AAA stainless at a reasonable price ... No luck yet unfortunately.

I've been wondering if more women would buy torches if they vibrated ... I meant the torches not the women ... It would be a convenient way of soothing neck pains particularly if the torch had an infra-red bulb ... It would give "heat and massage" from a small torch.

Talking about pain in the neck , I gotta go now 'cos my meal is ready.
.

mmmmmm thruxton...


well women like to complain. it's how they communicate.
i was hoping the conversation ended with a tactical strobe to the face(my wife loves that).
or tactical bezel to the noggin

Neither of the flashlights in my car are particularly pocketable (Surefire 9AN and Canadian Tire HID Spotlight). They are my only two lights that have direct charging capabilities (to the cigarette socket) so the back of the car is a great home for them. The lights I carry on my person are of a very different design. I am fortunate in that my wife is quite tolerant of any hobby I've had. After all, she's got three horses

I'll be Booed out for sure, but she kinda has a point.

I don't understand multiple purses unless they are of significantly different sizes, which might be justifiable.

For shoes, they are as much about fashion as function in that they 'need' enough to go with their outfits. Plus, in theory anyways, having 10 pairs of shoes vs just 1 means they last 10 times as long.


For flashlights, fashion really shouldn't be much of an issue. Instead its about getting the right combination to handle all your 'jobs'.
For me, my itp A1 is on my keychain and with 3 levels it handles just about everything. With 200+ lumens with a RCR123 it is plenty bright.
I have a SST-50 light with more throw and size to take care of when I need light for a longer period of time, or for more throw.

Some people hunt/camp/etc which might need or want another type of light to meet those needs.

But once you are past that, you are solidly in the realm of just collecting for the sake of collecting. Not that this is a terrible thing, as many people enjoy collecting. But at some point you really can't justify more flashlights as being needed.

march.brown said:

"Why do you need two torches in the car when you always carry one in your pocket ?" , she said , "And why is there at least one torch in every room ?" ... " You can't use them all at the same time!".

Click to expand...

ROTFLOL :lolsign:

Put a Chicago accent in that voice-over, and it's my wife.

Reply?

"Zombies. You can never be too sure."

JaguarDave-in-Oz said:

So, it appears that you used her madness to justify your own. What argument are you going to use when asked the same question by a more sensible woman that only owns two pairs of shoes and one handbag?

Click to expand...

I've never been near enough to one to know.

Well depending on her sense of humor, you could always say that all of your other wives don't mind having multiple flashlights in the house and quite frankly it makes them feel safe and secure.Just hide the 5 D-Cell Maglites before trying to crack this joke.

march.brown said:

Hi Bill ... I assume that you are not married ... Making your own coffee (for example).
Talking about pain in the neck , I gotta go now 'cos my meal is ready.
.

Click to expand...

So, this morning my wife looks at me and says, "so Bill, I'm almost through with my coffee ........" I get up and make her another cup. Been married to her for 28 years, and she doesn't mind my flashaholic behavior, joins me at the SHOT show's, and joined CPF this January.

Bill

march.brown said:

Hi Bill ... I assume that you are not married ... Making your own coffee (for example).

I do make my own hot chocolate though ... But that's because I don't want her to know how many spoonfuls of chocolate that I put in the mug.

When I read your opening few words ("I have just a few more than you") , I thought you meant Wifes ... Then I read further and saw you meant torches.

By the way , I've just ordered an iTP A3 stainless to go with my A2 stainless ... I'm trying to find a Maratac AAA stainless at a reasonable price ... No luck yet unfortunately.

I've been wondering if more women would buy torches if they vibrated ... I meant the torches not the women ... It would be a convenient way of soothing neck pains particularly if the torch had an infra-red bulb ... It would give "heat and massage" from a small torch.

Talking about pain in the neck , I gotta go now 'cos my meal is ready.
.

Click to expand...

I have had 2 wives and been living with a German lady for near on 6 years but presently on my own.

mcnair55 said:

I have had 2 wives and been living with a German lady for near on 6 years but presently on my own.

Click to expand...

Hi Bill ... Only two Wives ? ... You are either young or sensible or both.

My Wife doesn't really understand why I like torches.

My torches don't have an opinion about my Wife ... So torches are the safer bet ... I can look at my Stainless A2 and tell it that it is gorgeous and my Solarforces don't mind.

Why can't a woman be more like a torch ... Bright and yet still under the control of an "OFF" switch !
.