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Thread: I'd like to think this is funny...however

  1. #1
    Flashaholic* Wits' End's Avatar
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    Default I\'d like to think this is funny...however

    How far away is 1984?
    National ID #

    Operator: "Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your..."

    Customer: "Hi, I'd like to order."

    Operator: "May I have your NIDN first, sir?"

    Customer: "My National ID Number, yeah, hold on, eh, it's
    6102049998-45-54610."

    Operator: "Thank you, Mr. Sheehan. I see you live at 1742 Meadowland
    Drive, and the phone number's 494-2366. Your office number over at
    Lincoln Insurance is 745-2302 and your cell number's 266-2566. Which
    number are you calling from, sir?"

    Customer: "Huh? I'm at home. Where d'ya get all this information?"

    Operator: "We're wired into the system, sir."

    Customer: (Sighs) "Oh, well, I'd like to order a couple of your
    All-Meat Special pizzas..."

    Operator: "I don't think that's a good idea, sir."

    Customer: "Whaddya mean?"

    Operator: "Sir, your medical records indicate that you've got very
    high blood pressure and extremely high cholesterol. Your National Health
    Care provider won't allow such an unhealthy choice."

    Customer: "Darn! What do you recommend, then?"
    Operator: "You might try our low-fat Soybean Yogurt Pizza. I'm sure
    you'll like it"

    Customer: "What makes you think I'd like something like that?"

    Operator: "Well, you checked out 'Gourmet Soybean Recipes' from your
    local library last week, sir. That's why I made the suggestion."

    Customer: "All right, all right. Give me two family-sized ones, then.
    What's the damage?"

    Operator: "That should be plenty for you, your wife and your four
    kids, sir. The 'damage,' as you put it, heh, heh, comes $49.99."

    Customer: "Lemme give you my credit card number."

    Operator: "I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to pay in cash.
    Your credit card balance is over its limit."

    Customer: "I'll run over to the ATM and get some cash before your
    driver gets here."

    Operator: "That won't work either, sir. Your checking account's
    overdrawn."

    Customer: "Never mind. Just send the pizzas. I'll have the cash
    ready. How long will it take?"

    Operator: "We're running a little behind, sir. It'll be about 45
    minutes. If you're in a hurry you might want to pick 'em up while you're
    out getting the cash, but carrying pizzas on a motorcycle can be a
    little awkward."

    Customer: "How the heck do you know I'm riding a bike?"

    Operator: "It says here you're in arrears on your car payments, so
    your car got repo'ed. But your Harley's paid up, so I just assumed that
    you'd be using it."

    Customer: "@#%/$@&?#!"

    Operator: "I'd advise watching your language, sir. You've already got
    a July 2006 conviction for cussing out a cop."

    Customer: (Speechless)

    Operator: "Will there be anything else, sir?"

    Customer: "No, nothing. Oh, yeah, don't forget the two free liters of
    Coke your ad says I get with the pizzas."

    Operator: "I'm sorry sir, but our ad's exclusionary clause prevents
    us from offering free soda to diabetics."

  2. #2
    Flashaholic* Silviron's Avatar
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    Default Re: I\'d like to think this is funny...however

    Weeelll. This is probably stretching it a little.

    But this IS one reason that I refuse to use those "shoppers discount cards" at the grocery store, and why I use cash for nearly all of my "face to face" transactions.


  3. #3
    Flashaholic MenaceSQL's Avatar
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    Default Re: I\'d like to think this is funny...however

    Tomas posted this a couple weeks ago. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

  4. #4
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    Default Re: I\'d like to think this is funny...however

    hopefully we'll all be dead and buried when this really happens, but I have my doubts.
    bernhard

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    Default Re: I\'d like to think this is funny...however

    i'd move to the jungle.

  6. #6
    Flashaholic* GJW's Avatar
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    Default Re: I\'d like to think this is funny...however

    Sorry.... no jungles left.
    They've all been turned into Globally-protected environment preserves.

  7. #7

    Default Re: I\'d like to think this is funny...however

    We may be dead and buried, but our children and grandchildren won't. We've got to teach them to resist the continuing invasion on our freedom. Things like this permeate our society and our we grow numb to it because it is so prevalant, accepted, and easy to do with technology.

    Joe

  8. #8
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    Default Re: I\'d like to think this is funny...however

    [ QUOTE ]
    Kiessling said:
    hopefully we'll all be dead and buried when this really happens, but I have my doubts.
    bernhard

    [/ QUOTE ]

    I have to say that I have a real problem with this reply. I am pretty politicaly outspoken, and this is not the uncommon response. The only problem is I have children that will have to live on this earth. Our leaders want us to feel exactly this way, and keep seperated, that way we won't all come together, and put a stop to the madness. But if we don't who will?
    Having said this, this exactly the kind of talk that gets you a knock on your door these days, by the guys in the suits. So I guess I'll have to just invite them in, and have the first ammendment talk with them again... Uh excuse me while I get the door!

    JMHO

  9. #9
    Moderator
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    Default Re: I\'d like to think this is funny...however

    Bravo25, you are absolutely right. This is some sort of selfish view of myself that does not take into account the problem of others and especially our descendants.
    However, a single person (me in this case) has limited resources to spend in his life, and we cannot be active in all fields of our lives that may be of concern to us now or then. The principle of bigger societies / states is to charge different persons with different specialized tasks, and the others will have to trust those in charge about those subjects. Thus said, I'll just watch and hope they will get this thing right.
    Becoming incolved would require much more than just voicing an opinion here and there or make a cross when you are called to vote, and I personally do not have the power left to fight another battle out there, so just watch ...
    sorry if that view is offending or seems overly selfish to you, but I am simply not willing to use up that little time I have left for long-term political affairs.
    bernhard

    P.S.: maybe this will change if / when I have children, who knows ... [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

  10. #10
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    Default Re: I\'d like to think this is funny...however

    Kiessling, I am sorry. It wasn't meant to point a finger at you, but rather point out the governments keep us in line by keeping us diverse, in the dark, and overwhelemed in believing that we can't really do anything. You are right, one person, one ballot, one voice doesn't make a dent. What is needed is a place where people can together to resolve these issues. However here in the US they call that a militia with a subverative agenda, and it is promptly disbanded by governmental facilities with a bunch of 3 letter names.

  11. #11
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    Default Re: I\'d like to think this is funny...however

    Bravo, no need to be sorry, no offense taken and none intended. I can take some hits in a good discussion [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img].
    HNY [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]
    bernhard

    btw, we in Germany have rather fierce groups protecting the individual rights and data, even official ones form the gov. of course, they might become undermined and disbanded sooner or later, or just simply ignored. We have the same problem of governments trying to set up the perfect surveillance systems, for instance right now they try to install monitors to automatically check the cars number plates at important roads to be able to track down villains more easily. of course, they could also track down you or me just as easily [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/icon15.gif[/img]

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