At hoa meeting I'm so scared of crowds

[raggie33]

But I promised I'd show .

 

[thermal guy]

Just know that they are probably feeling the same way. 😁

 

[jtr1962]

If it's covid you're afraid of, N95 mask. If you still feel unprotected, put a surgical mask over that, although I'm not sure how much added protection that offers. And try to stay at least 6 feet away from people.

Or better yet just don't go. It's nice to keep a promise, but you have good extenuating circumstances. You could even tell people you're immunocompromised. Sometimes white lies are a necessity to smooth relations.

 

[raggie33]

people in general make me nervess. think of the most shy person you ever met im more shy. most people offline dont know i can talk.

 

[idleprocess]

It might feel like this, but in reality it's more like this.

 

[Lumen83]

They're nervous too. Totally normal. You got this.

 

[Chauncey Gardiner]

 

[raggie33]

i had so much to say but i couldnt talk i was that scared

 

[Poppy]

@raggie33 I'm sorry to hear that.
Perhaps next time, for the next event, you can plan to have someone speak as your proxy, in case you freeze up again. Perhaps then you won't be so nervous, because you know that you have a backup.

 

[raggie33]

im pretty sure what ever part of the brain control speech and communication of my brain is broke. ive had 3 or 4 head injurys. last one was the worse.

 

[Cyclops942]

Having been on the board of two different HOAs, and having been the president of said board once, I can guarantee you it's quite likely that the Board members don't want to be there, either, and don't want to get into arguments with anyone.

As member of the Board of Directors of an HOA, you're responsible for spending other people's money (yes, you pay the dues, too, but once it's in that combined bucket, it's OPM) in accordance with laws and the rules specified in the charter documents and the CC&Rs. You also have to keep in mind the good of the entire community, not just the complaining loudmouths who show up at the meetings only when they want to rip you a new one, and certainly not just for what benefits you. You have to make sure that there's enough money in the bank to pay for not only current ongoing expenses (electricity, water, property taxes, insurance, landscaping (including irrigation repair), plus paying the management company to do all the billing, inspections, and re-inspections, plus paying the bills, plus all the other stuff they do), but also future expenses, both certain (periodic required expenditures, such as replacement/maintenance of any community-owned property like playground equipment, pools, athletic equipment, or whatever your community might have) and uncertain (property damage, tree loss, cleanup from weather events, etc.). Even if it's only a handful of people who show up at those meetings, the decisions are made by the Board, not by popular vote (with certain very specific exceptions, about the only thing the average homeowner votes on directly is the election of members of the Board). So even if you make a decision that's best for the community, if it's only the trouble-makers who show up to the meetings (which, sadly, is all too common), you get "beaten up" by the attendees, and you feel like crap, even though you know you're doing the best job that's possible.

Anyway, if you're taking the time and making the effort to show up to an HOA meeting, good for you! If you can, please show up to all of them, not just the ones where you want to complain about things. Remember that being a member of the Board is an unpaid position, and often comes with lots of abuse from the community, from people who are COMPLETELY uneducated about all the aspects of any given issue. Some of them are so stubbornly joined to their ignorance that no amount of factual evidence to the contrary can convince them that they're wrong. So try to be as nice as possible to the folks who are taking time out of their lives to try to serve the community.

Now, if you're unfortunate enough to live in a community where the Board is made up of power-mad idiots, then by all means, run for the next open Board position yourself, and try to change things from within.