Surefire XG™ (Extreme Grease™)

Instead of recommending Nyogel to all their customers, why
doesn't Surefire formulate and market their own lubricant?

Why not something like this? Am I missing the obvious? :thinking:

haha yeah!!! i would buy it

Can science even develop a grease XTREME enough to be sold by SureFire?

Probably easier to just put Nyogel in a different tube.

Not science, only Chuck Norris can.

RyanA said:

Not science, only Chuck Norris can.

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That's for sure!

seery said:

Instead of recommending Nyogel to all their customers, why
doesn't Surefire formulate and market their own lubricant?

Why not something like this? Am I missing the obvious? :thinking:

New for 2008

Surefire XG™ Xtreme Grease™​

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I'd buy something like that in a heart beat!

I'd love to read the "Surefire True Stories" for that item! Imagine the uses...

RyanA said:

Not science, only Chuck Norris can.

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I don't even want to know which part of Chuck Norris they get the grease from.

Kestrel said:

I'd love to read the "Surefire True Stories" for that item! Imagine the uses...

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As I sat there waiting for the right opportunity to unleash my awesome light into the armed man's eyes standing just around the corner to temporally blind him, I decided to make sure my batteries were still good. To my horror the light did not turn on when I placed it up against my skin! I had to act fast So I reached for my spare batteries and started to unscrew the tail cap, at that moment the armed man walked up to the position I was hiding, I closed my mouth and didn't breath, any sound would alert him to my position, fearing for my life I unscrewed the tail cap waiting for squeaky sound to give me away. But no such sound came forth! My threads were silent! Thanks all to SureFire XG Xtreme Grease!

KeyGrip said:

I don't even want to know which part of Chuck Norris they get the grease from.

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It's naturally produced by his beard.

Monocrom said:

It's naturally produced by his beard.

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Actually I just got back from a trip to Vegas a week ago, and he had shaved his beard off. I think he said it was so that he wasn't so easily recognized while going on a trip with his family.

So it can't come from the beard at the moment.

PhantomPhoton said:

Actually I just got back from a trip to Vegas a week ago, and he had shaved his beard off. I think he said it was so that he wasn't so easily recognized while going on a trip with his family.

So it can't come from the beard at the moment.

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Chuck Norris sent his beard on vacation. It'll be back on his face, making more lube in about 2 weeks.

Oh, you didn't know that Chuck's beard is a seperate entity? Well, now you do. Chuck calls it Steve.

Strangely enough the beard (aka Steve Norris) pays taxes.

As a side note Chuck Norris is exempt from taxes, because no-one is man enough to collect them.

Re: Surefire XG™ (Extreme Grease™)

XG is great stuff as I use it on all my SF and Fenix lights. Conductive too! Where else can you find a foodsafe grease that works as advertised? It really is amazing vaporware I tell you :duh2: ...

Woo... I haven't been here long... I knew I'd find a chuck norris thread on here eventually... =P

Moka said:

Woo... I haven't been here long... I knew I'd find a chuck norris thread on here eventually...

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Wha??

This thread is about how Surefire produces their Top Secret grease.

Not sure you'll ever see it happen...after all, who would be man enough to apply it in the first place?! :thinking:

Surefire sends Chuck Norris to your house. It's all in the warranty.