Common courtesy............?

[PhotonWrangler]

Re: Common courtesty............?

Lightraven, I think you've hit it on the head. Larger cities tend to perpetrate rudeness much more than small towns do, the same way that drivers tend to feel less accountable for their actions because of that sense of being anonymous. But that's also no excure for a poor upbringing. Basic courtesy and manners should be instilled in everyone, regardless of location or social status.

 

[Lumenz]

Re: Common courtesty............?

I think most people underestimate kids of today. Sure, young people are not always very courteous; however, as kids get into their early- to late-teens, they become more socially aware.

How many times have you walked through a door after someone and the door was held open for you? Probably often enough that you really notice when it is not held open for you. I think that is the case when it comes to kids being inconsiderate as well. You don't really notice when someone says "Please" or "Thank you" because you expect it. However, when it is not said when you are expecting it, you take special notice.

Helping people and being courteous is actually rather addictive. Once you start doing it, it is hard to stop. Opening a door for someone, saying "Thank you very much" for something that the person had to do anyway, helping little old ladies get things off the top shelves at supermarkets... all of these things elicit a smile and appreciation from the other person; it makes you feel good about yourself and it makes them feel good as well.

 

[xochi]

Re: Common courtesty............?

I wish I saw more of that. I think that common courtesy is being lost to this new generation. I see alot of kids that spend most of their time inside on the computer or playing video games or watching these ridiculous cartoons. Once they get out with REAL people, they don't know what to do and have no idea how to properly interact with each other.

I don't know, is manners NOT taught in school anymore? This has been one of the biggest gripes I've had lately.

I'm 35 and I recieved no education about manners at school (the Boy Scouts was a different story though). These things aren't hard to pick up though. I generally practice them. I agree that people these days are pretty much media addicts and this makes it 100 times harder for parents to teach values without that teaching being erased by the values of pop culture (AKA buy-more-crap culture). I would also say that includes all of us sitting inside, staring at a computer screen acting self righteous about how no one knows how to behave anymore. Also, It should be said that when these "common courtesies" were in vogue, our culture was much simpler and these days the subtleties of cultures and even the number of variances that may define a culture have jumped an order of magnitude. For many teenagers, practicing these "comon courtesies" may endear them to an older culture while alienating them from there own culture of peers.

I also have no doubt that those young miscreants and whipper-snappers will be having a similar conversation in about 20 years. I'm very curious about what type of communications media it happens through.

 

[KC2IXE]

Re: Common courtesty............?

The other week - I was offered a seat in the subway - guess I'm getting old

I still get up and offer pregnant women seats on the subway - or folks older than me, people with canes, limps etc. I usually use a line that a friend told me with them when they start to say "no thank" "Please - I'm doing it for my own safety." Which usually gets a "Huh?" and I reply "Just stopping the earthquake that would be caused by my ancestors spinning in their graves if I DIDN'T give you my seat"

It usually gets a chuckle - and a thanks - and they sit - and usually shames some teen on the subway into standing

 

[Raven]

Re: Common courtesty............?

Don't forget, the pre WWI and depression era babies who raised today's "old poops" thought that generation was going to hell in the proverbial hand basket as well what with the lacivious motions of rock-n-roll and loose morals.

Don't kid yourself.

Today's youth really are different.

 

[chesterqw]

Re: Common courtesty............?

always say please and thank you.

 

[Diesel_Bomber]

Thanks everybody, glad to know that common courtesy isn't dead.


Cheers. :buddies:

 

[verbie]

This past new year, we have tons of guests over. this one young adult, 22 yrs old to be exact, ate a chocolate candy and told me that it tasted really bad. i inquired which one and commented that that particular one is actually good. she said right back at me, "it tasted like barf. i didn't know you like barf." she said it with a smile too. i was so shock and speechless that i just walked away. i'm 36 yrs. old. my family dont really socialize, and i've never been taught the etiquette of socializing. and still, i know that it's rude to criticize other ppl's food at a gathering. i was really upset at this girl but i decided to let it go. i figured her mom never taught her.

 

[Planterz]

One thing that bugs me is public swearers.

Now, in casual company, I swear a lot. A whole lot. Even (or rather, especially) at work. But when the phone rings, or a customer walks in, I turn the sailor talk off. Some people don't, and I have to yell at them. I've even had to yell at customers for doing this (I try not to be rude to customers, but there's a limit).

Same sort of thing in other public places. Like Circle K. It makes me want to slap people when they're swearing loudly in line, and 2 places in front of them there's a mother with her 7 year old kid. C'mon, have some effing courtesy!

I'm 26 in case you're wondering.

 

[James S]

when they're swearing loudly in line, and 2 places in front of them there's a mother with her 7 year old kid.

Oh, this also really pisses me off too.

The worst violators in this aspect in my life are my parents! I dont swear in just normal conversation much, when I do it's to very strongly accent a point But it seems that even my mom needs to accent a point more than is really necessary. She just can't seem to turn it off once she gets started talking about something.

Guess it comes from having been a high school teacher Picked up a lot of bad habits I have also accused her of driving like a high school student...

 

[LifeNRA]

One thing that bugs me is public swearers.

Now, in casual company, I swear a lot. A whole lot. Even (or rather, especially) at work. But when the phone rings, or a customer walks in, I turn the sailor talk off. Some people don't, and I have to yell at them. I've even had to yell at customers for doing this (I try not to be rude to customers, but there's a limit).

Same sort of thing in other public places. Like Circle K. It makes me want to slap people when they're swearing loudly in line, and 2 places in front of them there's a mother with her 7 year old kid. C'mon, have some effing courtesy!

I'm 26 in case you're wondering.

Do like I do and tell them to stop. Don't ask, tell. I have had 100% success in stopping people,all kinds, from swearing in front of my family.

 

[chmsam]

Some random thoughts about shopping for groceries or retail:

The person serving samples of food has probably heard "Where's my dinner? Hahaha" often enough.

The customer who just reached into the bowl from which the samples were being served instead of waiting probably hadn't just washed their hands, but did get in a snit when the employee had to throw out the food.

Ever go into a store in a ritzy area when the "horsey crowd" has just come in? And the boots they were wearing didn't get cleaned off after they left the barn. Mighty classy neighborhood, huh?

How many times have you found a used diaper while shopping? A Depends? It sometimes gets worse...

Didcha ever notice how while shopping some people will run into folks they haven't seen in months and proceed to catch up on old times? And they will do so while blocking the aisle for other customers for a very long time.

Am I wrong in thinking that more men are saying please & thank you, but less women are?

Maybe one sample of each product really is enough.

I once saw a grossly fat, unkempt, and unwashed woman literally sniff and turn her nose up and then say, "Oh, it's only sirloin steak" at a sample table. It was probably the best free steak she got offered that day.

It really is not the teenage kid at check out who sets the store policy and/or state alcoholic beverage laws, so why do people take it out on them?

Parents should be liable (and not the stores) for cleaning costs or lawsuits when the food they let their kid eat while shopping end up staining carpets or making someone slip and fall.

Shoving an employee out of the way, reaching under their nose to grab a product while they are working, or calling them "Boy" or "Girl" (especially when they are over 40) isn't going to get you better service or make their day either.

If someone grabs and pulls at the sleeve of an employee to get their attention, they deserve the kind of attention they get.

The nastiest shopers I see are older people on Sundays right after church, or is it right after they "get out" of church?

The lady who reaches into the bulk food, samples some, and licks then her fingers, is going to reach in again.

The three year old who picks his or her nose when shopping is gross. The thirty year old who picks her nose and then handles products is really, really gross.

The cost of shoplifters and other theives is not built into the everyday cost of doing business or absorbed by companies; we pay for it.

People do not look in the mirror to see how they are dressed before they go shopping -- be afraid, be very afraid.

No, I am not going to let your friends cut in front of me at the checkout. They can wait to pay for their stuff like everyone else. I don't care how old you are.

If you write a check or dig in your purse for exact change in an express line, yes, you really are an a*****e, and I'm probably going to tell you so if I am behind you.

No, I didn't want to find the rest of the sample you didn't finish eating dumped among the produce I wanted to buy. There was a trash can right there.

Using a gallon of perfume or cologne instead of a few drops won't make you pretty. It will make me gag and my eyes water as I'm shopping, though.

If I have to listen to you say in front of your f-ing kid that this f-ing store doesn't f-ing have what you f-ing want, then f-you.

 

[Trashman]

Thanks everybody, glad to know that common courtesy isn't dead.


Cheers. :buddies:

Your welcome. Now, shut up and get out my way, grandpa!

 

[robinhood4x4]

This thread reminds me of a radio ad I hear for a talk radio DJ. It's to the effect of, "women wanted equal rights. Well they got equal rights from me, I won't offer them a seat in the subway, won't open doors for them etc. Sure, I'll offer the guy on crutches a seat, but just because you're a woman doesn't mean I'm offering you my seat. I worked just as hard as you did today, I'm just as tired."

I think of myself as very considerate. I hold doors open, say thanks, don't stop in the middle of aisles at costco blocking traffic, move over a lane on the freeway when somebody wants to pass, etc.

Some of these gripes sound more like a generation gap thing rather than not being considerate. I'm sure "kids" don't think they're inconsiderate and they'll think the next generation is worse. For example, I grew up with "dude". I don't use the word, but don't mind it either.