Since I work with food and use a wide variety of peppers, here's my two cents worth.
In a nutshell here's what ya do - Get rid of the ribs and the seeds. Lots of heat there but little flavor. The oil in the ribs is what pepper spray is made with. The seeds are hot because they rub against the ribs. Use only the flesh of the peppers. Don't kid yourself about habeneros (scotch bonnets), they'll still be hot, but at least you'll get some flavor.
If they are too hot for you, don't drink water. You won't be able to drink enough. Since what makes them hot is an oil, water will just spread the misery. Try milk, yogurt, beer, or bread.
Wear gloves when you pick them or handle them in any way. You get only one time to make the mistake of touching your eyes or nose, or, uh, well, more personal areas. More than that and we have permission to laugh at your misery.
If you get some in your eyes, nose, or, well, ... some place, uh, shall we say "tender," flush the area with continuously running water. Let the water really run for several minutes. Then let it run some more.
I prefer to roast them.