deer are jerks
- Thread starter raggie33
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greenpondmike
Flashlight Enthusiast
They have a new cryptid out there. They call it "not deer". It looks like a deer, but it's not. They can be agressive. You have to concider though that it's mating season and bucks are in the rut--they aren't in their right minds just like we were when we were woman crazy--smitten with a particular female.
Not only that...they eat trees like they're going out of style. Ok then jerks, so I'll plant something you won't want to eat...tamarack, ha, now what, jerk deer?
Oh...you're gonna buck rub all the bark off when they're barely five feet tall? Jerks.
Oh...you're gonna buck rub all the bark off when they're barely five feet tall? Jerks.
It's humans who have created the problematic deer situation that exists in your area.
thermal guy
Flashaholic
Yes they are. Drove a pos van for 10 years to and from work in a very heavy deer populated area not a scratch. Got a new car and bam! swear to God they pick who there running out in front of.
PhotonWrangler
Flashaholic
We were driving a full sized van down a busy suburban street one day when a family of deer decided they wanted to cross the road. A couple of them ran in front of the van (barely missed them) but one of them jumped OVER the van, clipping one of his back legs on the roof in the process. Amazing. He wasn't seriously injured and kept running.
knucklegary
Flashlight Enthusiast
Smoked Deer Jerky is good!
Yes I'm more aware of that than you know...this is all a bit tongue in cheek of course. When deer are hungry they'll eat what they can. When they are diseased they'll respond how they do. And as far as I can tell they don't look both ways before crossing...
...they just don't have to be such jerks about it!!!
I used to think they were jerks, but now that I've met a lot more people, I've had to reevaluate that.
Seriously though, you might be surprised what they can catch:
COVID is tearing through deer population
It’s not necessarily unusual to find the same disease in humans and animals. But the results of a survey of deer conducted last year were remarkable.
www.abc15.com
pnwoutdoors
Enlightened
Don't have anywhere near that many in my area, until I get out into the wooded areas away from town. (Smart deer.)
As for driving, I can't recall the last time I nearly beaned one. They seem to like the lit-up section of roadways that an approaching car creates. Clipped the heels of some, with the bumper, decades ago. But nothing in the past 20yrs, I'm happy to say. (My bumper thanks them, too.)
Squirrels, OTOH, are a different story. Those little guys have a death wish to compete with any animal alive. If a car's coming, then by golly they want to cross right then and there. Even if coming from 15ft off the road, the moment the car's in the worst possible spot they seem to want to head to the other side at the worst possible time. Thankfully, most of the deer don't seem to think that's such a hot tactic. Very thankful for that.
I ran distance team for track and field one year in high school (was terrible at it thus only once). One day during my summer training run came upon a dead one about a mile into my route (the only route available to me). Gross but not bad. But after a few days in the August heat it was so bloated and reeked that I wanted to hold my breath for about a half mile, but of course I was breathing with all my might, and I was sure I was going to contract some kind of pulmonary necrosis...
A few years ago I was driving to a store where a country road was the route there. Approaching a sharp curve I had slowed way down when a big ole doe sashayed into the roadway and stopped.
I was like "no no no no, don't stop there"…… bump. I was going about 5mph when I hit it. It tipped over onto its side and just spun like a top a few rotations. I got out and checked on it. It was frozen stiff. Kill it? I wondered, but did not have a knife or gun. So I drove off.
On the way to the store after that a chicken commited suicide. On the way back the deer was gone. I figured it was just stunned. When I got home I wondered if either had happened. There was deer fir stuck to my bumber and chicken feathers under the truck, so yeah I guess both had actually happened.
I was like "no no no no, don't stop there"…… bump. I was going about 5mph when I hit it. It tipped over onto its side and just spun like a top a few rotations. I got out and checked on it. It was frozen stiff. Kill it? I wondered, but did not have a knife or gun. So I drove off.
On the way to the store after that a chicken commited suicide. On the way back the deer was gone. I figured it was just stunned. When I got home I wondered if either had happened. There was deer fir stuck to my bumber and chicken feathers under the truck, so yeah I guess both had actually happened.
I lived in southwest Wisconsin for a time, in an area of dairy farms with cornfields and woodlots. Lots of habitat and lots of deer. I never came close to a collision myself, but I knew people who had hit deer. They'll stop and stare at an oncoming car, especially at night. Bad business on a 2-lane road with constant curves. My wife once ran over a chicken that darted in front of her car. She got out, picked up the dead bird and knocked on the farmer's door to confess her sin and offer to pay for it. His wife answered the door, and all she said was, "Oh, they're so dumb. Just take it home with you and have it for dinner." Which she did, and which we did.
A solution: (Taken a quarter mile away from our house)
Hooked on Fenix
Flashlight Enthusiast
- Joined
- Dec 13, 2007
- Messages
- 3,649
Deer are the worst at jaywalking I've ever seen. I'd run them over, but it would total my car and only cost them a buck.
I had two episodes with deer.
One in December during the Christmas shopping rush. I saw him on the shoulder of a highway in an area, where one would never expect to see a deer. Very metropolitan area. I thought that if he ran out, there would be a multiple car crash, so I slowed my van, and hugged two lanes, to slow traffic.
The jerk ran right into the side of my van, hitting the front right fender, and door. He bounced off and ran back to the shoulder. The repairs went through comprehension insurance with only $100 deductible.
About 20 years later, my Crown Vic was about ten years old, and the headlight lenses were getting a little cloudy. Fortunately, a deer ran right in front of me very near my home, and I was doing less than 40MPH. I probably hit him doing 10, but it cracked one of the lenses, and my front grill.
For $100 deductible, I go two new lenses, and a shiny new grill.
Overall, there are more deer in my area, over the past ten years, and I think they are learning how to cross the street.
One in December during the Christmas shopping rush. I saw him on the shoulder of a highway in an area, where one would never expect to see a deer. Very metropolitan area. I thought that if he ran out, there would be a multiple car crash, so I slowed my van, and hugged two lanes, to slow traffic.
The jerk ran right into the side of my van, hitting the front right fender, and door. He bounced off and ran back to the shoulder. The repairs went through comprehension insurance with only $100 deductible.
About 20 years later, my Crown Vic was about ten years old, and the headlight lenses were getting a little cloudy. Fortunately, a deer ran right in front of me very near my home, and I was doing less than 40MPH. I probably hit him doing 10, but it cracked one of the lenses, and my front grill.
For $100 deductible, I go two new lenses, and a shiny new grill.
Overall, there are more deer in my area, over the past ten years, and I think they are learning how to cross the street.
They didn't learn it by watching the chicken……regardless what the joke says.
