Flashlights, Wifes and guilty feelings

[lightcacher]

I was in a large department store one day and saw a sour faced old woman walking down one of the aisles. Following about ten feet behind her, carrying her handbag, was her stoop shouldered husband. The look on his face said it all, this was a man with a broken spirit. Saddest thing I've ever seen.....:mecry:

 

[Dioni]

pour husbands..

to know that all of our wives were afraid of the dark at beginning of the relationship! :shakehead

 

[rhotondm]

I would agree that you might want to slow down and pace yourself. Putting 25 extra dollars a week into a separate account will build up pretty quick. Although my wife can't tell the difference between my DBS and MD4 so I think I will be okay. But unlike a lot of members here I don't have 20+ lights lying around. I like to keep 4 to 6 lights that I use all the time. Plus my wife knows that lights are very important to me in my line of work. The most used tools on my belt.

 

[wirehair]

We have a word around here for your kind...
I'll give you a hint
MEOW!

But seriously, I feel sorry for your wife. I bet she thought she married a man.

OK OK... no more jokes..
Really Serious now
uhhh ... hmmm ....
Do you wear panties?

:nana:

Quite honestly this was posted for a bit of fun! No Im not a ***** and I dont wear panties. But due to a serious back operation that went wrong I am unable to work,(in fact can hardly walk) so my wife brings in the money and there never seems to be enough to pay the bills,so as much as I love flashlights they are not high on the list of things to bye around here.I thought this forum was better than some of the bulls..t some of you have written.

 

[Braddah_Bill]

wirehair, don't take it too hard most of the guys are just playing around with you - you know guys, we just like to give each other a hardtime-- EVERY chance we get :devil:.


I also had a problem about my wife understanding my lights - and a bunch of other stuff too, but I sloved it, I don't have that wife anymore

I am a little concerned about this:

"there never seems to be enough to pay the bills."

If buying lights is getting in the way of paying the bills, then you may need to slow it down, and also, make sure the wife gets something nice for herself once in awhile.

I think deep down inside you know she loves you....she may be at that "for better or worse" and is sticking it out because of the way she feels for you.

 

[Wiggle]

I don't have a ton of lights (9) and many are cheapies so it's not that bad, but I'm trying to condition to GF to my sickness to see if she's a keeper

 

[Vesper]

My lights don't = my wifes shopping / hobby habits, so she doesn't really care but I do feel like I'm one-up when on delivery day the package finds it way to me first.

That said I'd never buy lights or anything too unnecessary if money was tight.

 

[bladerunner]

Wirehair....I too was shocked to be reading this type of answer on CPF. I do think that a little fun/joking snowballed a bit too far. It's good to have a hobby and it's good to have a flashlight(s). Enjoy them all.

 

[jahxman]

Wirehair, pay no attention to the mouth breathers who can only imagine what it is like to have a female in their life, they like to fantasize about how macho and in charge they would be; the reality is far more complex and satisfying, and men who never experience a true loving connectionn with their partner can't understand that.

Yes, it is better to be a man and lay it out in the open, and let the chips fall where they may; but you don't have to give up what you love just because she doesn't get it. If she respects you (which is eroded by not being honest with her, btw) then she can accept your hobbies and interests, and in the long run it will work out better; you will have both your hobby and your self-respect, and a deeper connection with your wife. Remember, she's not your mother; she's your friend, partner, lover, etc. - and deserves your trust in letting her know where you are really at.

I know a lot of us hide the scope of our obsession from our wives; I did as well. When I came clean there were fireworks, but she now supports my hobby and actually makes an effort to "get" it. This would be impossible if I were still trying to hide everything from her. Did I have to slow down on buying lights? Yes - but I was really spending too much anyhow.The benefits of being able to enjoy my hobby openly far outweigh what we had to go through to get here. Stick to your guns, be reasonable, try not to be defensive, and be a man. That's my advice.

 

[iapyx]

I guess I just married the right woman.
She knows about my enthusiasm for lights and she knows what they cost. You know what she said to me: I spend much more on clothing so don't feel guilty about buying one or two expensive lights a year. (expensive in the range of 100 to 300 USD)

Don't know about your wife's expenses, but maybe it's better to be honest about it.

 

[Roger Sully]

I have annoyed my wife showing her lights that she doesn't look at them anymore !:twothumbs
If she happens to notice one I just give her the old " I've had t hat for so long you just never noticed it"
I guess to the average "Non-flashlight" person they start looking alike after a while.:thinking:

 

[Hacken]

Hi all, I am new to all of this and being in New Zealand its big $$$ to bye these lights but I have at the moment, TK30,TK12,LD20,M30,P7 and a few others but my problem is this. My Fenix supplier is under strict instructions not to ring,text or email me about lights he is sending or has sent. But the trouble I went to when I knew my TK30 was about to turn up frightened even me. I started leaveing lights that looked a bit like the TK30 laying around the house so THE WIFE would get used to a bigger flashlight being around, things like a maglight 2xc cell. Then when the big day comes Im realy nervice, I start by leaveing the TK30 somewhere but cover most of it up so it looks like the mag. Then over the comming days slowly reveil more and more:huh:.After a week I was in the bedroom, we went to make the bed, she reached for it,(at this point the heart is raceing) picked it up and never looked twice:twothumbs. Should I be feeling guilty about this or not, what sort of lengths do some of you go to to hide your new lights and if I ever get caught Ill just blame everyone here on CPF

just say it's a hobby like what i always say.. lol

 

[jamie.91]

oh my word!

give me her number, she obviously needs talking to:tsk: lol, show her the new light and if she aint happy show her the door lol

cars, lights and similar come before women time and time again lol

jamie

EDIT: remember you NEVER have to explain yourself! ever....

 

[birdog]

This is what I did to buy a $6k road racing bicycle...After all the custom add-ons I wanted, I started paying once a month out of my discretionary allowance, (plus a little bit more). It didn't take too long before it was all payed off..That was the day I had the bike shop owner call the house when I knew my wife would be home and notified her that I had won a BRAND NEW BIKE! All I had to do was go pick it up.

Probably will work only once....

 

[ab1ht]

It's easy to let the flashlight thing get out of control. One thing that might help is to make a list of short, medium, and long term flashlight goals. Then set aside x dollars per month and that's that.

I know my wife keeps an eye on my flashlight spending and will say something if it looks like I'm going crazy. She also knows it's a hobby and it's better than a lot of other things some men do at mid-life.

Just keep it all in perspective. This board included. Some of the young/single/renter guys on here will get a serious wake-up call when they have a family to support and a mortgage to pay.

 

[Fallingwater]

Yet another thing to tell people when they ask me "you never want to marry? Really? Why?".

 

[KiwiMark]

Anyway my wife has like a thousand clothes so she cant really fault me for buying a few inexpensive lights (I never go above $80 for a light).

Imagine if your wife never spent more than $80 for a pair of shoes or a dress - you would be rich enough to buy all the lights you could ever want!

 

[Swedpat]

It's not the first time the conflict between the flashlight hobby and the better half has been discussed at CPF. I guess I am lucky to be unmarried.
Until then I have the chance to get as much flashlights as possible... :tinfoil:

Regards, Patric

 

[chenko]

I'm having not the same problem but sort of with my main "hobby" (shall I call it so), which is knives... I don't own many, and all of them get used by me whenever I can/need, but still they look like a LOT to a person who is not into that sort of thing. They sometimes cost a lot too (100 to 300 euros), and I have a low wage, but still I manage my buys not to get into financial problems: I live with my girl, we have bills, vet bills and everything else to pay for. Still, if she knew about all the knives I have I believe she would get a bit mad... I feel guilty for hiding anything to her, but I also know she really hates those items and doesn't even accept me talking about them, and this ain't fair I believe. So... guilt is sort of under control, I just hope every time the postman gets me first.
Just make sure you always keep it under control and trade what you don't rally need anymore and you'll be ok! :thumbsup:

 

[jhellwig]

I had money set aside in an account to do with what I pleased. Wife wanted to consolidate accounts so that got dumped into joint accounts. Had tones of change around the house saved up. She hauled it to the bank. Sold a transmission and that got put into the bank. I accumulate money and then lose hold of it. We got all the debt paid off and paid allot of money for our wedding. I still don't get to blow my money with permission.