I lived in Cary for about thirty years after finishing college. We moved a couple miles down the road to Apex a few years ago. Wife wanted a new house. Cary and this whole area has been growing like crazy since the late '60's. Population was about 10K when we first got there. Now it's around 100K. It is a very nice "small town". Crime is low and services high. They have handled the growing pains pretty well. Traffic is getting a bit tedious, but it's not too bad yet. With all the growth there are lots of job opportunities, especially in service industries. Just a few miles from Cary/Apex is the Research Triangle where there are many high-tech companies (Cree is one). Jobs in the medical field are plentiful, too. Durham is known as the City of Medicine. Cary has a few hotels and Raleigh (7-10 miles away) has plenty, so there should be jobs available.
I wouldn't necessarily limit myself to just Cary, as the whole Raleigh/Durham/Chapel Hill area has a lot going for it. Housing cost in Cary may be a bit higher than some of the other adjacent towns, but you'll find all levels throughout the area. School systems here are county wide, so all the schools are pretty much equal, and pretty highly rated. I may be a little biased since my wife has made a career in the school system (Wake County Public Schools).
I'd have to say this is a good area to raise a family. It's becoming more and more urban, but there's still a country feel. You're just a couple hours from the beach or the mountains, too. It would be a big change, but folks around here are friendly and welcoming. Ajustment would be pretty easy. If you want to PM me with any specific questions I'll be happy to try to help.
Geoff